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Member since: February 19, 2012
Click on the picture to follow Feanor to my DeviantArt page. Click here to find my on AO3.
I just sorted out the fic's I need to write in order to explain other fic's and discovered I've writing material for the next four years. Not counting the occasional oneshot or porn. Personally I don't thing a reader order is necessary since so far very fic is self-explaining, but some stories are a response to another story. If my dear Encairion is to blamed for an idea, it'll be mentioned accordingly like always-
A shackle around your mind (Námo, Irmo)
A black spot on the sun (Maedhros/Maeglin)
Neither light nor darkness (Maedhros/Maeglin)
Things we lost in the Fire (Finarfin, Maedhros, Maglor)
I'll be wrong, I'll be strong (Finarfin/Eärwen, Olwë, Melian)
SERIES OF GREATER MISFORTUNE:
The World breaks Everyone
(In which Maglor is creepy and insane. His family tries not to care.)
Heaven's Reward Fallacy
(Maedhros/Fingon - In which Fingon struggles with life and never seems to get it right.)
Rated: Mature [Reviews - 5]
Characters: Fingon, Galadriel, Gil-galad, Maedhros, Maglor, OFC, Orodreth
Content: Het, Slash
Chapters: 1 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 2934 | Read count: 2581
Published: July 02, 2011 | Updated: July 02, 2011
Date: November 16, 2012 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
This is an excellent solution for the debacle of Gil-galads questioning origins^^
Rated: Mature [Reviews - 474]
They had been damned for their pride.
Damned for their passions.
Damned by the Valar and by Morgoth Bauglir.
Hated and envied by both.
Reborn into an older world and freedom, they had discovered that the jealousy of Gods does not fade, and that damnation has an agelong reach.
In dark Angmar, the Mouth of Sauron feeds his ambitions with unspeakable acts. Coldagnir the Balrog begins to learn what freedom is, whilst in New Cuivi
Characters: Aegnor, Aredhel, Balrog, Beleg, Celegorm, Daeron, Elladan, Elrohir, Eluréd, Elurín, Eru, Fëanor, Fingolfin, Finrod, Gil-galad, Glorfindel, Gothmog, Huan, Legolas, Maeglin, Maglor, Mouth of sauron, OFC, OMC, Orc, Thranduil, Túrin, Uruk-Hai
Content: Action/Adventure, Angst, AU, Drama, Erotica, Explicit Sex, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, Incest, Kink, Rape/Non-con, Slash
Series: Magnificat Of The Damned
Chapters: 75 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 351950 | Read count: 215544
Published: July 05, 2011 | Updated: November 14, 2016
Date: February 19, 2012 Title: Chapter 39: Chapter 39 ~ So Many Streams of Fear ~
Up until now, I was a silent reader, but I am about to change that. I have finally read through most of your verse to leave a decent review. I have to admit that I haven't read yet what happened during the Ring War, when Gil-Galad died and the first story with Vanimore lays a while back, but I'm familiar with the “Magnificat of the Dammed” and its gorgeous!
I love Feanor, I love the Feanorian's, Maeglin … (him especially, I have a weakness for characters like him!) and the way you bring them together. Heck, I don't even know where to start.
Perhaps it should be Maeglin, since it's him who intrudes me the most, since he is the only one, who's probably bound to end tragically. Right now I can't seeing him survive and live in happiness someday. Because there is no life he can return to, if (or better: when) he gets captured by the Mouth or sacrifices himself in another way. It will happen, but not soon. Not before Turin has grown up and Maeglin's presence revealed to those who dwell in Middle Earth. The onslaught he will have to endure after this, will probably be a part of that, which will make him desperate enough to help Turin kill the Mouth.
Who is said to kill the Mouth, but I suspected he won't be able to do it alone or without having to pay a price. Maeglin dying or coming very close to is one of possible costs. Not to mention that the Mouth is searching for (futher / ensured) immortality and he already used Bainalph and his blood. A captured Maeglin, I fear, could be the critical part that enables Turin later in some way live longer than a normal man. It would fit, since everybody hopes that Beleg doesn't have to live through finding and losing his love again.
I would fear for Maeglin's life (or his existence in your verse) if I wouldn't surely be able to bet on Maeglin and Turin becoming something like friends. Turin has a few things in common with Maeglin, a certain desperate edge in his soul for instance, and since Maeglin is already bound to reforge Anglachel I can see it happen. Not without difficulties, since jealously will play an important part and Maeglin will be faced with(or at least fear he will) losing Beleg to Turin, but Maeglin will also (probably and unwillingly at first) into some kind of mentor role for Turin.
Like I said, they have a lot in common, starting with a difficult relationship with their foster fathers, which love they always doubted at some point. There's also a onesided-love (though Turin is the one, who doesn't love Finduilas. Not the other way around like it had been the case with Idril) and the habit to make decisions that lead to unfortunate outcomes. If one can one call it habit, trying to get away from a father who has your guts for looking like Feanor, whom you are never able to surpass and unintentionally triggering death to those you love around you. Since accidentally killing thy fathers advisor and your lover causes the same lone behaviour Maeglin embraces.
Their fear to cause more sorrow always has lead to not having a friend at your side, when you needed him. It would be fitting for them to become friends. After long hours of debating who induces more grieve. Forgiveness is a avoided topic for Maeglin, because he fears (/believes) he could be thrown back into the void since it wasn't for the right reason the last time. Taking responsibility for a younger Turin would be a away to redeem himself and I remember Glorfindel saying to Maeglin a flashback that it its hard to befriend someone who doesn't grieve for his own father.
Curious topic, but I will have to wait until you continue the story in order to learn more about Maeglin's and Turin's fate.
But they are important. Maeglin at least is a counterbalance for Glorfindel, who has to prove he would aid every elf in need. Even those he doesn't like (Feanor), those he dispises (Celegorm) and those he wishes dead and don't deserve his had in his opinion in the first place (Maeglin). For me, Maeglin keeps Glorfindel human, because Glorfindel is mostly working over good intentions, not experience like Vanimore does. Vanimore is aware that damning Maeglin would harm Glorfindel more than Maeglin in the end. Reason for that would be Maeglin's doubtful bargain with Morgoth in the past and his lack of criminal behaviour now. Glorfindel's judgement would be seen as harsh, perhaps cruel even. Depends on how far and how fast Maeglin redeems himself. I think Glorfindel will have to bring himself to save Maeglin this time, to show he is “the better man” and a good guardian of the elves.
In addition I wonder if Glorfindel (it would fit the story in my eyes, but I'm not sure if it has been mentioned or not) blames himself for I losing Maeglin / letting him get captured in the first place or II being in charge of the search party that Turgon probably send out, when his “son” never returned. Glorfindel, in his mind or subconscious at least, knows that Morgoth could have broken Maeglin under torture and without the bargain, but he doesn't want to admit to having being played like this. Since he, Turgon and and the elves of Gondolin were, because Morgoth sized the chance in my eyes to turn a Feanor look-alike into a traitor. Better even, if he manipulates and stages the fall of Gondolin in a way that even the traitor believes the scheme.
This might be just my own interpretation and secret wish for Maeglin, but it would at least explain why Morgoth behaved so differently in this case and offered the bargain at all. He has tortured countless elves and turned them into ugly orcs, when leaving a rotten soul in a beautiful body would have far more productive. The elves are easy and quick to hate orcs, because they are ugly and the last chapters have proven not all of them are monsters. Long tradition and the lack of prospects let the raping/torturing habit surface and Celegorm's servant has proven that elves are capable of these acts as well. Not easily, but they can.
Maeglin (back to my subject) is a symbol and a test for the new age. Because if he, the ultimate traitor, can be redeemed, means that others (like Feanorian's, half-orc's or Balrogs) can be as well.
One has just to admit of being able to make mistakes. Like I would like to see someone confront Turgon about is parenting skills, since in my eyes he has his part to carry, when it comes to Maeglin. Not just Ulmo's warnings. For me it begins that Turgon doesn't compare as foster father to Maglor or Elrond. Glorfindel said that “Turgon loved you like a son!” … not “He saw you as his own son!”.
For Maeglin (and his history with E
Date: March 17, 2012 Title: Chapter 40: Chapter 40 ~ Indifference Has No Place ~
It is not surprising that one of the Finwions gets restless and wishes to join the war that is breeding in Angmar. Even less so since it's Tind
Date: October 19, 2012 Title: Chapter 43: Chapter 43 ~ The Shadow of Brilliance ~
Yes, there's a new chapter and I shamefully admit not having reviewed the two before. Perhaps because I have trouble to truly grasp, where Thranduil and Bainalph's story will lead to. The Finwions are far easier to handle. Strange, but true ;) First: I just loved the conversation about Finarfin. He too has his faults, but he had also been very alone and without support in Valinor. Unlike his brothers, who clung to each other, even after death.
Date: January 02, 2013 Title: Chapter 44: Chapter 44 ~ A Clouded Gem ~
I think I nearly died, reading this chapter. But I had to live, because I wanted to see how it ends and it was glorious!
Feanor, Fingolfin and Maeglin. They are truly a lethal combination and the more I read the more I come to the conclusion that Gondolin was the worst place for Maeglin to grow up. Any other Lord, any other place would have been better, because how Maeglin suffers from being the unloved child is just upsetting.
I still want to rip Turgon to shreds. I remember Maeglin talking about not being the only prisoner, certainly Turgon would notice if an entire company vanishes? Well, notice perhaps, but its surprising how much a soul can ignore when it is determined.
But at least Fingolfin proves that he's wiser than his son and a greater king. As angry as a he was, it was just as obvious that he could not lay hand on Maeglin. For his grandson himself, not only Aredhel. Like Fanari said in the beginning of book one: pain is the only excuse that it explains it and traitors are usually raised, not born. Or pushed into a corner without hope to escape, leaving them nothing but doomed defiance.
I like Feanor's insight on Maeglin, how he's just as ensnared in the Valar's grasp as Finarfin is. Curiously both have in common how utterly alone they stand against a overwhelming force of malevolence and resentment. Which means that I just adore this sentence: "Where was his own hate? He searched for it, found it, a little thing buried deep under the concentrated wrath directed at the Valar and their fallen brother."
But I better not start quoting now or else I will never stop. I would have to put half of the chapter inside the review, because it is just divine how Feanor describes Maeglin and Fingolfin facing each other. What a standoff. Amusement is radiating off me, because ... just a inch of more dryness in Maeglin's voice and I would be howling with laughter. He's proving himself to be truly his mother's son since he Maeglin can't be stopped by his grandfather and his Highking. But at least they try and thwart the direction of his path to a different end.
This meeting should be gruesome and bloody. The fact that it is not just speaks for the underling need to love (and be loved, in Maeglin's case). I really wondered if Fingolfin would be ready to face Maeglin. In something else but anger, but I admit he has exceeded all my expectations. Perhaps he couldn't simply not act the way he did, when he saw how deep his grandsons scars go.
I'm looking forward to the confrontation between Fingolfin, Feanor and Turgon later, when he's told that he goes to war to rescue Maeglin from Malatur's clutches. A chance to redeem himself as uncle. He has failed so miserably the first time. Let's see if E
Date: January 02, 2013 Title: Chapter 44: Chapter 44 ~ A Clouded Gem ~
"I remember Maeglin talking about not being the only prisoner, certainly Turgon would notice if an entire company vanishes? Well, notice perhaps, but its surprising how much a soul can ignore when it is determined."
I did write about that too, but I'd have to find where; ...
Hm, Book 1, if I remember correctly. About the time Glorfindel discovered Maeglin coming to Middle Earth. Around the chapter Van stopped Glorfindel from slaying Maeglin outright.
... I'm shocked I remember this, but on the other hand I have read the first book so often, it shouldn't surprise me. I'm obsessed.
Author's Response: I'm shocked I remember this, but on the other hand I have read the first book so often, it shouldn't surprise me. I'm obsessed.
Well, wow. When I began Dark Prince, I never thought any-one would be even a little bit interested. Thank-you. I will have to come to you when I need to remember something I wrote d;-) I am much better at remembering other people's work than my own!
Date: March 07, 2013 Title: Chapter 45: Chapter 45 ~ Black Crucible ~
My first thought actually was: 'Holy Crap, Edenel is that old?' But it would finally explain much about him and the hints you have been dropping. I cannot say how much I adore you for delving into the second negative Morgoth could have created. Not wrong and ugly, like Orcs ... just simply turned in the inside while still possessing elven beauty. But Edenel did not seem evil, I guess there is more. It's obvious that he is not a mindless soldier and right now I will even assume that he was free of influencing shadows on his soul.
Yet he spoke of facing fears ... perhaps he wants to, but I wonder what will be his reason to do so?
Oh, even if it is just many years in the future, I fear for Maeglin. With Tind
Date: May 26, 2013 Title: Chapter 46: Chapter 46 ~ Shadows and Roots ~
My Heart. Seriously, my heart. What have you done to it? And my poor jaw that nearly cracked by desk?
The last revelation that Edenel is Finwe's brother was something I would have never guessed. While I always had my doubts that Finwe had no relatives on his own and then so many children, you completely mislead us when it came to that particular relationship. Of course it immediately leaves wanting to know more. I guess it's most difficult for Edenel to admit this. Finwe was dead most of the time and he never had to face the descendants of his brother. I wonder how was the first Finweion Edenel met in person? Elrond probably, but it's hard to find someone, Elrond isn't related to.
Still this last sentence takes my entirely off the track. Before you distracted with the glorious tease of Edenel and Finwe, I was taking Vanim
Date: July 24, 2013 Title: Chapter 47: Chapter 47 ~ The Dark-Shattered Past ~
My smile is so wide right now. Finwe as father of all the passionate Noldor, I wonder how will he react? Sadly I cannot see his face, therefore I will content with the image of spontaneous combustion. Flames everywhere :)
Otherwise the chapter was very intruding. Van deserves a friend, a comrade who knows what it means to be tainted with darkness. I will gladly see more of it. But the greatest highlight (aside from the fact that they call Maeglin Lomion already) what Elgalad getting angry. Have I ever seen I'm angry before? I can't recall if he has, so I take this as subtle, but incredible character development.
Author's Response: My smile is so wide right now.
Really :D I am glad I could make you smile with Finw
Date: October 24, 2013 Title: Chapter 49: Chapter 49 ~ Morgoth's Ring ~
Lovely! I was curious who would be in your focus now and returning to the Sons of Feanor is something I greatly desired. Feanor has so many of them and in the past chapters, they received less attention than they deserved. Bringing Caranthir and Maedhros into the fold is good, them have both a good sense for politics and their view is interesting.
It's refreshing that the chapter is told by another person, Caranthir and Maedhros have a different focus and their outward view to their father's recent travel is important. When Feanor was in the North and when he returned, he appeared calm and collected, but his sons know him better. They can also better estimate the feelings of their followers. The Noldor in general need Feanor as impulse, as someone who urges them on. Caranthir (and Maedhros especially) are better entitled to explain and translate Feanor's intentions.
As long as they don't entangled with their own issues again. They seem to be slowly coming around. It's just sad Caranthir only commented on Curufin and Celebrimbor, but with the impending storyline I guess the focus lays somewhere else. I can ignore lovely Feanorian father-son relationships, when two other Feanorians are about to get involved with Turgon. Not only, because I wish to see how they handle him (I'm afraid my view is biased, because I love Maeglin so much), but because Fingolfin's family knows far more inner disunity than Feanor's. At least it seems that why, since Turgon rallies those Noldor behind him, who don't agree with Feanor's lifestyle. Not really his fault, just logical I guess.
I wonder how he will react to Maedhros, who he makes most likely responsible for Fingon's death. (Life choices as well.) Wanted or not, Turgon could easily fracture the Finwe Clan again. It's fine as long as he has just Maedhros and Fingon to ignore. Any hint to Fingolfin and Feanor's relationship could break him. At least I guess that's partly what Ecthelion is hinting at? The official policy to same sex relationships supported by Feanor and an (official) half-willing Fingolfin?
Maedhros, without even looking, slammed a hand down on Caranthir's thigh. The warning was clear.
Love that line, it speaks of a world made of intimacy that surrounds the Feanorians. Hard to imagine that with Turgon and Fingolfin. (I'm a bit confused, what exactly Ecthelion intended with "And he is Fingolfin's son" ...
So ... coming meeting will be interesting. I'm hoping for Elenwe to be a regal woman, who keeps her husband in line. I imagine her to be a reasonable person, but Fingon's also present she probably feels obligated to stick to her husband, who could easily accuse Fingon to be in league with Maedhros and therefore, with the entire Feanorian horde. He wouldn't be wrong, now with the Kinslaying no longer being a pressing issue.
The next chapter I will have to reread. I adore Morgoth and Sauron. They are no longer a shadow on the horizon. Love how they see themselves still as untained, therefore as Melkor and Mairon. Did they ever cared about the names, they were given? I'm curious how you will solve the ideological issues. Or who will stick with who, since I doubt that the Noldor strong enough to take on the Valar and the forming resistance in the Void without any losses.
Threating Glorfindel is logical and I look foreward it. I wish to know how he handles being a Valar and threats to his person. A challenge would do him good, he seems a bit aloof and has currently no-one who truly opposes and argues with him. (Feanor doesn't count, because he is always an exception.
One thing I would like to know: is the absent banner Glorfindel's or Maeglin's? The text indicates both.
And: In which story Glorfindel's rebirth is discussed? I've kind of forgot the reason why Glorfindel was allowed to return, when he broke the laws like everyone who went into the void? I image that could create some resentment among the returned?
Before I forget it: thanks for adressing E
Date: February 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 51: Chapter 51 ~ Nothing Is Over, Nothing Is Ended ~
I think I missed the last chapter, but its events go well with this one.
Of course I like the fractions between the many Finweions and how Fingolfin stood at the center of it. He cannot solve the issue between Turgon and Maeglin by himself, but I adore his asessement that Maeglin woulnd't have betrayed him. It's the most beautiful sentence in this chapter.
Aside from the fact that I hope Turgon will prove himself kind one day (see what you do, making me place hope into a character I usually try so hard to hate), Tuor is a riddle. Idril maybe something different, but he has simlpy outlived his usefullness. Valinor doesn't change, but in Middle Earth I would expect him to clash with people with his ancient believes. He has already.
The development with E
Date: February 16, 2014 Title: Chapter 52: Chapter 52 ~ What I Am ~
In chapters like this I forget that Bainalph and Tind
Rated: Mature [Reviews - 105]
This will be a collection of fics, commissioned art, and gapfillers to flesh out events within my Dark Prince/Magnificat 'verse.
All will mesh with I Will Lead And Thou Shalt Follow, the pre-Third Age chapters of Dark Prince and Magnificat of the Damned.
They will not necessarily be in chronological order.
Characters: Balrog, Celegorm, Fëanor, Finarfin, Fingolfin, Fingon, Finrod, Gil-galad, Glorfindel, Ingwë, Maedhros, Maglor, Melkor/Morgoth, OMC, Sauron
Content: Angst, AU, Drama, Erotica, Incest, Rape/Non-con, Slash
Chapters: 45 | Completed: No | Word count: 30936 | Read count: 73449
Published: July 05, 2011 | Updated: March 22, 2019
Date: November 17, 2013 Title: Chapter 11: Chapter 11 ~ Never Again ~
I freely admit that I adore Fingon. His love for Maedhros (slash or otherwise) often feels glorified. Here I finally get the feeling that it wasn't was easy, as it was always made out to be. In Maedhros life Fingon's death was one of many tragedies, but overall he had it (a bit) easier, because he always had his brother's support. Fingon struggled while his family slowly drifted and then fell apart. At loving someone, who is so loyal (first his father, than his brothers and only than his lover) is difficult at best. Bridging a gap in dark times like the First Age a highly respectable feat, especially when many hearts are filled with prejudge.
This is a great character introspection.
Author's Response: Here I finally get the feeling that it wasn't was easy, as it was always made out to be.
I don't think it would have been easy, no. As you say, Fingon's life seems to me to have been a struggle. This is my own belief, but Fingolfin's family does, as you say, seem to have fallen apart, whereas Maedhros' did always have his brothers. Fingon's life does seem to have been more lonely, at least in Middle-earth. I have that feeling of loneliness for Fingolfin, Fingon and Gil-galad.
Thank-you for commenting, Mangacrack. :)
Rated: Teen [Reviews - 3]
Characters: Elrond, Gil-galad, OMC, Oropher, Thranduil
Content: Angst, Character Death, Gen, Vignette
Chapters: 3 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 4379 | Read count: 6411
Published: July 18, 2011 | Updated: December 20, 2012
Date: October 02, 2012 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
I was weeping the entire time ;_;
I lobe the way you portrayed the emotions.
Author's Response: Aw, I'm sorry I made you cry, but I'll take it as a compliment. :) Thanks for your comment. I am quite fond of this little story.
Rated: Teen [Reviews - 3]
Characters: Celeborn, Celebrían, Elrond, Galadriel, Galion, Gil-galad, Glorfindel, Haldir, Oropher, Thranduil
Content: Humor, Romance
Chapters: 1 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 2363 | Read count: 2392
Published: March 01, 2012 | Updated: March 01, 2012
Date: November 16, 2012 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1
Let me tell you, I adore this story. I believe it summarizes the problems of the elvish socity incredibly well. It can not be easy, deciding who to marry when the desicion is nearly irrevocable. But my personal love goes to Celebrian's hesitiation regarding Elrond, because he has been raised by Feanorian's. It implys who difficult Elronds life must have been (or is) at some points.
You have written a great story!
Rated: Mature [Reviews - 111]
Sequel to The Price of Duty. The continuation of Erestor and Lindir's tale into the Second and Third Age, and the beginning of a woman's from the deep South of Middle-earth who was sold into slavery and taken North.
Characters: Aragorn, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Erestor, Gimli, Glorfindel, Legolas, Lindir, Maglor, OFC, OMC, Thranduil
Content: Angst, AU, Character Death, Drama, Dubcon, Explicit Sex, Het, Rape/Non-con, Romance, Slash
Series: The Price of Eternity
Chapters: 28 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 141413 | Read count: 49385
Published: May 02, 2012 | Updated: November 21, 2015
Date: September 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 12: Chapter 12
I admit I skipped parts of the first chapters, because it was a lot to take in from a new character. Tamar's story got easier to follow in the later chapters, when she started interacting with known people.
For the rest, I think it's good that you rewrote the story. It's less confusing now and greatly enjoy Erestor & Lindir struggling over Noldor / Sindar differences. And all the difficulties and the prejudge they meet over the time. Predicably Glorfindel revealing his heritage was the greatest moment so far. My heart fluttered a bit.
What I also like is your describtions of the twins: wild and a bit unrealiable. It fits better into their character, their are not as responsible as their father (not yet).
Now I promise that I will (try to) follow you updates better. If I'm not cursed with traveling for work and being without a internet connection, but we will see each other again, I promise.
Thank you for reviewing and giving this story a go :) I know OC’s can sometimes be a bore when we’re reading fan fiction for the characters we already love, goodness knows I’ve sometimes found myself reading stories where I skipped over OC’s parts! But I am glad to hear things got more enjoyable when the story line headed back into known characters. I myself didn’t realize how much time we would spend in the Eastern lands of ME, scenes just kept popping into my head and I found the Easterlings a fascinating people to explore.
“Predicably Glorfindel revealing his heritage was the greatest moment so far. My heart fluttered a bit.”
Oh gosh, I loved writing that scene! I am so thrilled you liked it :D
“Now I promise that I will (try to) follow you updates better. If I'm not cursed with traveling for work and being without a internet connection, but we will see each other again, I promise.”
I wish you luck and safety on all your travels :hugs: I know life can get in the way. I hope you have a chance to enjoy the story, but the updates will probably be slower than they once were as it is. Thank you again for the review!
Date: November 16, 2014 Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 19
I love the twins so much and I greatly agree with this version of them. Especially since we also get to see what kind of effect Aragorn had on them. He gets downplaed far too often when elves are the maincharacter.
And I can't help but to compare the twins to Maedhros and Maglor. I wonder what kind of effect their grandfather(s) had on their choice. In my head they came very, very close to swearing on oath (something like "Get rid of all orc's" etc) but hestiated due to Elrond's tales. As for their choice, as long as there are Orc's to hunt, they would never lean towards mortality.
Poor Elrond, to think that orc's ensure the existence of his sons.
I’m thrilled you liked the twins! They were fun to write, but painful too with all the pain dwelling in the back of their actions. Yes, I agree with you about Aragorn, he did have a huge influence over their lives; they must have loved him immensely to never harbor bitterness against him for winning Arwen’s heart.
They have that Finwëion fire in them for sure, and yes, I can see Maedhros and Maglor in them too, the way they were in the end with nothing but their Oath and each other left.
Poor Elrond indeed. Guy just can’t get a break. He chooses immortality and then lives long enough to lose everything (well, at this moment in time, I like to hope things get better for poor sad Elrond :(
Thank you so much the review! It wonderful to hear you’re still enjoying the story :hugs:
Date: August 31, 2015 Title: Chapter 26: Chapter 26
Oh I love the development of Maglor and Glorfindel returning to Imladris. It's nice. I know I should focus on Erestor, Lindir and Tamar but yet the only thought I have is "Elladan and Elrohir are meeting their grandfather."
Well, I should focus on other things. Why Tamar is so fearful of the outside world for instance. But I'll reread the story anyway. My last review is around chapter 12 (?) so I properly missed (?!?!?) a few updates or don't properly remember.
So I can only go in the last three chapters who want me to have Maglor and Lindir in a conversation at least. But Maglor is so happy right now and Lindir is still ... scared, I guess. though it pains me he still thinks Erestor as Noldor in this chapter. I thought he was beyond this?
“I know I should focus on Erestor, Lindir and Tamar but yet the only thought I have is "Elladan and Elrohir are meeting their grandfather."
Well seeing as how I couldn’t leave Maglor or Glorfindel out myself, it’s all for the good, those two just steal the spotlight, don’t they :) Yes, Elladan and Elrohir get to meet Maglor, and I think it will be a dammed good thing for those two if they just stop running long enough to listen to what he has to say. Talk about someone who knows a thing of two about guilt and revenge and seeing someone you love be tortured!
“Well, I should focus on other things. Why Tamar is so fearful of the outside world for instance. But I'll reread the story anyway. My last review is around chapter 12 (?) so I properly missed (?!?!?) a few updates or don't properly remember.”
Hahaha, don’t worry, you know I get behind in reading myself, I appreciate that you came over for a read and review :hugs:
“and Lindir is still ... scared, I guess. though it pains me he still thinks Erestor as Noldor in this chapter. I thought he was beyond this?”
I may have written that part badly. I don’t think Lindir does see Erestor as a Noldo still, rather, he was thinking about the fact that he didn’t…I shall go back and reread what I wrote, it was probably badly worded, sorry! He does still have issues with Maglor though because Maglor isn’t just a Noldo, he’s one of the Feanorions. Erestor is as well, but Lindir doesn’t see him as a symbol of oppression like he does Maglor. But I think, with some time, Lindir will be able to live beside Maglor. It was half the shock of it all that sent him into a panic attack.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing :hugs:
Date: November 22, 2015 Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28
I'll let you kno that I had absolutly ZERO motivation to write. Nothing. On the single day I'm not wrapped up with work. So i came here for a distraction. And voila, you work wonders again.
Or namely, Elrohir. I could go on about him for hours but I will safe that for another time. Because knowing that "Price of Memory" is know complete I'm still left to wonder how will Erestor and Lindir far in the future. The fic ended at a point where they're happy but I see them clash pretty often in the future.
Otherwise ... you keep teasing me with Maglor and Glorfindel. The way this is going I'll have to write my own fic to satify a mighty need.
“I'll let you kno that I had absolutly ZERO motivation to write. Nothing. On the single day I'm not wrapped up with work. So i came here for a distraction. And voila, you work wonders again.”
Yes! I am so happy it could give you a little nudge :) Reading is often the best thing to get the gears working, but I know what you mean about how terrible it is to have a day off work and then not feel any spark towards writing. I have a terrible habit of beating myself up over wasting prime time!
“I'm still left to wonder how will Erestor and Lindir far in the future. The fic ended at a point where they're happy but I see them clash pretty often in the future.”
Oh yes, you are so right! Lindir is still Lindir, will all his issues (and he’s back off to the heart of the Noldor again with Maglor living there now too! That is not going to be easy), and Erestor is still Erestor with all his self-doubts and regrets (though he’s gotten better at not hating himself over the years, but he’s far from loving himself). They have a lot to work through, both of them not quite convinced the other is still going to love them a century down the road one of the major ones!
“Otherwise ... you keep teasing me with Maglor and Glorfindel. The way this is going I'll have to write my own fic to satify a mighty need.”
I have been a terrible tease with these two, sorry! Yes, please on a fic from you about these two! Yum! It would be fascinating to see what you did with them :D
Thank you so much for the review! (I am still over here waiting in breathless anticipation for your upcoming story :vibrates with excitement:)
Rated: Mature [Reviews - 64]
The story of Erestor's life in the service of the sons of Fëanor. He grew up in the shadow of the Oath, became a Kinslayer at Doriath, and struggled to survive within a blood-stained people whose pride ran as deep as the curse binding them, and the despair they denied as they fought to reclaim jewels they worshiped as their salvation and gods.
Characters: Celebrimbor, Elrond, Elros, Erestor, Eärendil, Gil-galad, Glorfindel, Irimë, Lindir, Maedhros, Maglor, OFC, OMC
Content: Angst, Character Death, Drama, Dubcon, Explicit Sex, Femmeslash, Het, Incest, Rape/Non-con, Slash
Series: The Price of Eternity
Chapters: 30 | Completed: Yes | Word count: 172934 | Read count: 51583
Published: May 04, 2012 | Updated: August 31, 2014
Date: February 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 14: Chapter 14
Erestor is a character I have often a hard time to connect with. His backgroundstory is varied and only something of convenience for many. Here he has more personality and more development to look upon. I like how he was a rather innocent child once, who has completely changed now.
Especially the last part with M
Date: March 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 15: Chapter 15
I am sorry that I didn't immediately review when you put up the chapters, but I didn't have the time to read them at once. Now I am glad I finally did, because holy hell, i need more of this.
The implications about Morvio are great, because there is the factor of the age difference and an adult laying with a child. It's hard to get a Fandom opinion in this, because it's fine when they are all off age. But how do elves see the thing with an "informed decision"? The age gap exists between the Noldor and the Elves of Endor to begin with. Taking it further: is there a line, when there are centuries or an entire age to bridge? I guess I can now the need for ceremonial's and rituals in the Silvan's culture (thinking back to Maeglin).
What I also squealed about is Celebrimbor returning to the Feanorian Host. I guess it would make sense, because he isn't really safe anywhere else.
*thoughts automatically travel down to Sirion and the twins*
But it also means he will have a long standing history with Erestor (and Elrond?) in the Second Age.
Wow! Thank you so much for these lovely reviews, and please don’t apologize for taking a few days to sit down and read, we all get busy, and it’s a gift any review you give whatever the span of time :D And this is such a treasure because I’ve been lacking motivation lately for writing (you can probably tell from the lack of recent updates) and your lovely words have acted like a kick in the behind!
“Taking it further: is there a line, when there are centuries or an entire age to bridge? I guess I can now the need for ceremonial's and rituals in the Silvan's culture (thinking back to Maeglin).”
This is a really good point. I think it probably depends on the society, like with Maeglin, I don’t think the Wolf Clan was as strict about things like this. I don’t think they had a definite age they drew the line. Some of this might be because they work up to their coming of age through the course of trials, like what Maeglin had to under-go, so they were progressively earning their majority and it didn’t just come upon them with a certain age.
The Noldor I think were defiantly the strictest (as they were in all things sexual). And while Erestor didn’t have a huge problem with it, I think this was because, as with most things that aren’t considered socially acceptable, if you have a personal experience with it (like he had with Lalauro), the its easier to see the rules bent, and see the age line as flexible and dependant on the person rather than an overarching rule. Maedhros however, had to uphold the laws in a general sense, because even if there had been not even the slightest hint of coercion between Mórivo and the youth, that would have been incredibly hard to prove, and with the age distance, the risk of coercion or manipulation is just too great a risk and Maedhros would always chose to uphold the general law rather then look on it as a case-by-case basis.
As far as the Age long difference of age, or one of centuries goes, I think it wouldn’t matter to Elves as long as the partners were both of maturity. Maybe some eyebrows would be raised, like with our society when a 50 years old marries a 20 year old, but it’s not illegal or anything. And once you reach a certain amount of years, does a few more thousand years in your partner really make that much difference? I think what was experienced in those years would be far more defining. You can be a hundred and have lived through more than an Elf who was born in the time of the Trees and never left Valinor.
“But it also means he will have a long standing history with Erestor (and Elrond?) in the Second Age.”
Yes, Celebrimbor will know them before the SA, though I don’t think he would have been close yet. We’ll see him again in a few more chapters, but Celebrimbor is a pretty reserved guy, it takes a while to get through his shells.
Date: March 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 16: Chapter 16
*reads the first line*
You are writing the battle of Sirion! I knew there's a reason I loved you. Not only you delve into the part most author's skip (because they don't want that their beloved Feanorian's to plan another kinslaying for days and months), you know how to pace a story. I was prepared to read more chapters based on Erestor's disheveled state of mind, but I admit I was burning to see what happens in Sirion, because it's next big event.
It still makes me a little squeamish to see (sense?) Maedhros smile like this. It reminds me that you can't live through the End of the First Age as the greatest war lord with your sanity intact. And yet he spares the few sane Noldor, who are leaving Sirion. Praise you for writing this, by the way. Sirion was filled with refuges and there must have been some riddled with common sense, a bit knowledge of history or just enough survival instinct not to get caught up in this.
And points to your writing skills that Feanor's name still invokes shivers at this point and hasn't been reduced to a daily curse.
The blood-lust doesn't even surprise me at this point. Killing gets easier with practice and the Feanorian's have at war ever since Finwe's blood sullied the grounds of Formenos. It's a passive addiction, a dependance they aren't even aware of. Their lives are so drenched in misery and blood, it's just hopeless. At least it gives them the strength to tear their desires from their foes (if it hadn't been for Elwing). Perhaps because they can distinguish between "fighting" and "killing someone". The elves in Sirion are not people anymore, just obstacles like orcs or a spiked fence.
But: Did you mean random or ransom when you wrote: “Those are the twin sons of Elwing. Lord Maedhros has taken them for random. Their mother, Elwing, chose the jewel over them.”
Both would make sense. Even Maedhros raising elven children at random.
But there's nothing random in Elros and Elrond's choice. They are obviously old enough to see how their mother didn't love them or how they can't remember E
Date: March 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 17: Chapter 17
How sad it is that they must return to Doriath? It makes sense, because the woods couldn't have remained empty after the kingdom fell. It's too big to stay a memorial, especially if it sustains desperate people- Given how dark the days were and how much Morgoth had already taken at this point, I support this decision.
But of course you must shatter my heart again by sending the twins away. I see the sense behind it and the lines drawn in sand, but I can wish that one day it will be enough between Elrond and Maglor. The differences with Elros are big enough, he seems to grow into his own person, the King who will create Numenor. It shines through already, but Elrond is still so innocent, help me please.
And to Elros: “You won’t be able to carry the forge tools, but take your finished works. I’ve picked out some pieces of ours for the both of you.”
Did you just...? *jaw and heart drops into a groundless chasm* Well, it makes sense. There's nothing left. At first I though Elros had grown like a man and worked in the forge, but for Maglor to give away the last remembering of his family. it takes a lot. I hope Elrond and Elros will appreciate this one day, but since Elrond becomes a Loremaster, I guess he does.
Oh, so he did work in the forge? It makes sense, for the Feanorian's to pass a useful skill along. Especially if Maglor is last to do some quality groundwork, even if is no master. At least not, when compared to his father.
Maglor's state of mind is a good thing to include, because it gives some point for reference, when he will leave later. His exclamation: "There's no life in Valinor" (notable to lack of 'for me') says everything. Even the last act of disbanding their host makes sense. It leaves more surviving Feanorian's for the Second Age than I hoped.
I just wish that the remaining Sons of Feanor will see Morgoth fall. I can't hope for them to be responsible for a critical help in this war, but they can be there/b> when the Valar force him to kneel. And perhaps Elros could make up his mind? I know, logically that it will take his entire life to understand, but at this moment he is so young and hurtful towards Maglor.
*gathers strength for the next chapter*
“The differences with Elros are big enough, he seems to grow into his own person, the King who will create Numenor. It shines through already, but Elrond is still so innocent, help me please.”
Yes, Elros will get their eventually, but he still has a lot of issues to overcome. But right now I see the twins’ age as in their mid-teens (like 14), and Elros’ actions especially reflect the turbulence of these years, while Elrond still clings to the innocence of childhood a bit longer.
“Did you just...? *jaw and heart drops into a groundless chasm* Well, it makes sense. There's nothing left. At first I though Elros had grown like a man and worked in the forge, but for Maglor to give away the last remembering of his family. it takes a lot. I hope Elrond and Elros will appreciate this one day, but since Elrond becomes a Loremaster, I guess he does.”
Ah, well, I don’t think Maglor and Maedhros, despite having little to look forward to in life, gave the twins everything they had left of their family, but a few pieces, yes. The twins were really the only legacy they had now (I am sure Celebrimbor has a few of his own pieces too). And yes, I think the twins defiantly treasured them.
“Even the last act of disbanding their host makes sense. It leaves more surviving Feanorian's for the Second Age than I hoped.”
I am glad it makes sense. There’s so much going on here, that sometimes I fear I fly through things, or jump to conclusions and the getting there leaves reader’s scratching their heads lol! But yes, some Feanorions are still around for Celebrimbor to build his city in Hollin with :D
“And perhaps Elros could make up his mind? I know, logically that it will take his entire life to understand, but at this moment he is so young and hurtful towards Maglor.”
I can’t say I blame Elros for his behavior so far (but that’s just me). He’s so young still, and we all lash out in anger and hurt in those years and make mistakes. But given their traumatic upbringing it’s a wonder Elrond is as well adjusted as he is. I mean, Maglor loved them, but he also kidnapped them, and I think Elros still remembers the night they were taken. Plus Maglor isn’t in a mental state to be an ideal parent or even decent one at this point. He loves the twins and did his best by them, but he and Maedhros are swinging very close to the edge now and the height of their breaking: Maedhros killing himself and Maglor spending a time driven mad with grief (though I like the way you write him, that he doesn’t remain in that state for Ages of the world).
“*gathers strength for the next chapter*”
Sorry! I don’t know if this is a terrible thing that you need to do this or a wonderful thing! I just love tormenting everyone too much I guess lol!
Date: March 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18
Finally a chapter of delight. I feel with Erestor that he has to look after the boys. It will be his job for the rest of his life, probably. Even if they all deserve a break. Catching up with the simply pleasures of life, after the years behind them.
But it cannot last, can it? I should have been expecting difficulties for the remaining Feanorians and those branded with that name. With so many people, they are the last to be fed. The conversation shows much about politics again and how time passes differently for people. To say to an exile Noldor the Kinslaying on Alqualonde is still fresh in mind must sound like a petty remark from the past. Even if it's true for Teleri.
Yet I dearly hope that the Exiles get to fight, or else I will call the Valar deranged.
Seeing Morvio again is a pleasant surprise, but he does have the side-effect to show how else fate has been effecting lifes.
“It will be his job for the rest of his life, probably.”
Oh yes, especially at this point. He’s taken up guarding them as his duty, and you know how he lives for his duty lol! But seriously, they are pretty much the only reason he’s still enduring since he’s got nothing left to live for in his own life.
“To say to an exile Noldor the Kinslaying on Alqualonde is still fresh in mind must sound like a petty remark from the past. Even if it's true for Teleri.”
This is such a good point, thank you! Yes, for the Teleri in Aman the Kinslaying was the defining moment of the last Age. They have faced no other war, no other deaths, so of course they wouldn’t have moved passed it. Unlike with the Exiled Noldor, they don’t have all these other horrific events (and uniting joys and battles) to overshadow that horror.
“Yet I dearly hope that the Exiles get to fight, or else I will call the Valar deranged.”
The Valar are deranged :snorts: But seriously, I am almost 100% sure that it’s cannon that the Valar forbid the Exiles from participating in the War of Wrath. I do know for sure that the Aman Teleri never got off their ships. I think the Valar were as controlling as ever, and would have done their best to see their rulings upheld (they couldn’t control a small band of Fëanorion warriors, but a large army marched North by Gil-galad would have been easier to prevent).
Date: March 08, 2014 Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 19
Last chapter for now and your stories are a dwell of inspiration - like always. Bringing up the education of Elros and Elrond is an important fact that I forgot until now. It explains how Gil-galad could have such a huge impact on their lives, when they found the love of a family in Maglor's arms. There wasn't enough time or resources for a proper education.
Educating is also the encounter with a mortal men. So far Elrond and Elros have been living with Elves. From the Feanorian stock, you can't get more immortal (in a sense of the spirit living on and showing through the shadow of death) than this. Just the confusion about having a good is mind-numbing. I can't even blame it all on Maglor and Maedhros, Elwing didn't give them a better life either, even if Maglor tries doing so by sending them away.
Moving on, the description when they are entering the hall is beautiful and show much of the difference in Elvish society. It's a wonder Feanor ever made them agree to leave Valinor in the first place, because the gap between Noldorin fractions hasn't changed over time - just hardened.
The crown on the other hand is another subject that makes me curious. It's the sign of legitimacy. Feanor forged it and it's meant for the Highking. Even if I have no idea how Turgon got his hands on it. Did it magically appear on his hand? Did Lady Fuilme surrender it? I guess in the book they forged a new one, but here? It would mean there's less thrive for the throne in them than in others. *has strange thoughts of Curufin intercepting the crown to get Kingship into his family again, but that's just my imagination running wild*
I guess it it will be enough for my "Game of Thrones"-influenced mind that Erestor defends Maedhros so eagerly. Reading on, it's justified I guess. At least at this point, when there's still Maedhros dominating every image of regality.
But Gil-galads arrogance doesn't help. Not his fault, I image. It's the lack of adversaries that spoil him. Elrond and Elros will be a good experience for him. And shouldn't there be Finarfin running around somewhere?
“The description when they are entering the hall is beautiful and show much of the difference in Elvish society. It's a wonder Feanor ever made them agree to leave Valinor in the first place, because the gap between Noldorin fractions hasn't changed over time - just hardened.”
I am glad you liked it! I’m really enjoying writing Balar because of all the different cultures coming together. There would be so many political strains, and yes, it truly is a wonder Fëanor could have overcome them, and it also leaves me in awe of Gil-galad as a king. He must have been one hell of a ruler to have held all these people together, kept good relations with different races with all these fracture lines running beneath the surface, and all on this little scrap of land!
“Even if I have no idea how Turgon got his hands on it. Did it magically appear on his hand? Did Lady Fuilme surrender it?”
Ouch, you caught me! I have no idea how Turgon got the crown or Gil-galad after him :cringes: I didn’t think about it until this moment. But if I had to guess I’d say it was a delivery via Eagle for Turgon (I can’t see Fingon ridding into battle with the thing on, he’s way to practical of a guy for that), or else some of Fingon’s people had it and turned it over in the retreat? As for how it survived the fall of Gondolin, well, I think Turgon knew he was going to die when he refused to leave his tower, and at least had the thought to have someone get the crown to Idril before he decided on suicide.
“*has strange thoughts of Curufin intercepting the crown to get Kingship into his family again, but that's just my imagination running wild*”
Lol that would have been awesome! I could totally see Curufin plotting that :grins:
“But Gil-galads arrogance doesn't help. Not his fault, I image. It's the lack of adversaries that spoil him. Elrond and Elros will be a good experience for him.”
We are seeing Gil-galad through Erestor’s eyes, and I’ve got to say, Erestor has some serious biases against anyone but Maedhros who claims the High Kingship, so the lens we are seeing Gil-galad through it a tinted one, and not a favorable one at all (though if this changes I will leave for you to discover :D ). But you make a good point about Gil-galad having no adversaries as yet. He didn’t get the chance to grow up around the great leaders of the Noldor, but more than this, he was also thrust into the Kingship at a ridiculously young age (both his parents were Aman-born because remember, his mother is actually Galadriel though he doesn’t know it).
I know, it’s unfair of me to make all these hints at things when you don’t have the full picture of Gil-galad’s character in this story! Sorry. I am evil. Forgive me.
“And shouldn't there be Finarfin running around somewhere?”
:rubs hands together: Yes! I can’t wait to write him since I’ve got him planned :grins: Again, I think the Valar would have been trying to control a lot of stuff in this war, and keeping the Aman Elves away from the ‘rebellious’ influence of the Exiles would have been one of these things they aimed to do. But Finarfin is defiantly here, and we will see him in future chapters :D
I cannot thank you enough for these lovely, lovely reviews. You have made my day a thousand times over ::hugs::