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~ Magnificat of the Damned. Book IV: Anvil ~ by Spiced Wine Mature
From Angmar to the Dagor Dagorath. The final story in the Magnificat of the Damned series. The Doom and destiny of the...
Ossë's Gift by elfscribe Mature
On a sea voyage from Umbar, Erestor becomes enmeshed in intrigue while fighting his secret feelings for his irritating and...
I'll be Yours if You'll be Mine by NelyafinweFeanorion Teen
Modern setting AU. Maedhros/Fingon. Maedhros owns a bookstore. Fingon is in grad school. Expect appearances from varied members...
Protector of Dreams by cheekybeak General Audiences
A small mannish boy haunted by nightmares, growing up in Imladris, finds a protector in the most unlikely of places. 
The song of tomorrow by Nuredhel Explicit
The past reaches out towards the future...A living mystery is being delivered to the king of Mirkwood as a gift and a strange...
Even the Birds Are Chained to the Sky by cheekybeak Teen
The story of Legolas, Elrohir and Maewen in Valinor. A Silvan child runs free and safe in Valinor but how free is he? A mother...
Shadows Of The Past by Starfox General Audiences
After a disastrous incident in the mountains Elrond's past experience allows him to help Thranduil and Legolas cope with...

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Shoutbox

Spiced Wine
11/15/17 01:29 pm
Article on The One Ring.net - Christopher Tolkien has resigned as director of the Tolkien Estate. This could change 'everything' to quote.
Spiced Wine
11/14/17 10:38 am
I got the news from his Facebook, lol, he was very excited!
NelyafinweFeanorion
11/14/17 12:38 am
Royd Tolkien just confirmed it on his twitter account. No details other than that.
Spiced Wine
11/13/17 10:29 pm
I should think they'll have actors falling over themselves for this. If it's done well the fandom will go boom!
Spiced Wine
11/13/17 10:28 pm
The One Ring.net is a good place to get the latest.
Naledi
11/13/17 09:41 pm
I found the link. It all seems very vague atm. I look forward to hearing more once they've got news on story, etc.
Spiced Wine
11/13/17 09:27 pm
Sorry, Nelyafinwë - didn't see you already posted, but yes, links don't post on the shout box. This could be v.exciting!
Spiced Wine
11/13/17 09:23 pm
Amazon press release, it's on my LJ, Tumblr and Facebook, but just type in Lord of the Rings t.v.
Spiced Wine
11/13/17 09:23 pm
Just our: Amazon has got the rights. And it will be new storylines, prequels and spin-offs even
NelyafinweFeanorion
11/13/17 08:32 pm
Maybe appendices stories? Celebrimbor and Annatar? The creation of the Rings?
Shout Archive



Name: Gabriel (Signed) · Date: July 12, 2017 7:03 · For: Chapter 5
This chapter made me want to cry.
You wrote this so well, Encairion, I had to get the tissues out.
Oh my gosh! There is absolutely nothing left of Curufin. He is a shell of a being, nothing left of the original person anywhere within him. He has gone so far beyond feeling that he's become a machine, just going through the motions everyday.
The whole foresight thing, where Curufin believes he and Celegorm saved Maedhros from his fate in the Battle of Unnumbered Tears and so Curufin now believes he can void fate. I wish I could have told him, "Its not going to work, this time Curufin, its not going to work," sniff.

But the last part of the chapter, Caranthir, defiant to the end and beyond. Him watching his brothers as they scramble to save Curufin and Celegorm and their helplessness.
So hopelessly sad.
Now, just to peeve Mandos off, Caranthir's going to float about Beleriand in an endless existence.
I wish their story did not have to end there, its a shame.
Awesome story Encairion!
:)

Author's Response:

“This chapter made me want to cry.
You wrote this so well, Encairion, I had to get the tissues out.”

I cried writing it! (but then, I cry writing scenes a lot lol).  It is the best complement to hear you were so moved by the story, thank you!

“Oh my gosh! There is absolutely nothing left of Curufin. He is a shell of a being, nothing left of the original person anywhere within him. He has gone so far beyond feeling that he's become a machine, just going through the motions everyday.”

Yes, he really has been destroyed.  It makes me cry thinking about him when he was young, and then what he became.

“The whole foresight thing, where Curufin believes he and Celegorm saved Maedhros from his fate in the Battle of Unnumbered Tears and so Curufin now believes he can void fate. I wish I could have told him, "Its not going to work, this time Curufin, its not going to work," sniff.”

I know, that desperate belief of his is if just tries HARD enough he can save Celegrom, but then also to think about the fact he did not dream Caranthir’s death, and what if he had saved Celegorm’s but Caranthir died?  And maybe he thought if he had been at Caranthir’s side and not Celegorm’s Caranthir wouldn’t be dead…it would have been torture for him.  In the end, it was probably better for him to died with them.  I cannot imagine what would have happened to his soul and mind if he had outlived them.

“I wish their story did not have to end there, its a shame.”

It is really tragic when read by itself, you are so right.  The only way I got through writing it is to know this really isn’t the end of the story!  They will be reborn!

 

Thank you so so much for these reviews, and taking the time to read the story :hugs:



Name: Gabriel (Signed) · Date: July 06, 2017 14:21 · For: Chapter 4
It's nice to see a story solely from Caranthir's perspective. We don't hear from him often enough, sorely forgotten in some quarters.
Caranthir's such an antagonist, that it is unusual and nice to see a caring side to him.
Wow! Curufin is a mess. Wanting the excuse to end his life, any excuse, you just feel for him. And as time goes by he becomes cold and calculating and hard to the core.
In the end his brothers lose the real Curufin, replaced by a stranger.

Great story Encairion. Love it :)

Author's Response:

“It's nice to see a story solely from Caranthir's perspective. We don't hear from him often enough, sorely forgotten in some quarters.”

Too true!  I wish there were more Caranthir fics out there too!  Or ones that explored more of his life than just his meeting/relationship with Haleth.

“Wow! Curufin is a mess. Wanting the excuse to end his life, any excuse, you just feel for him. And as time goes by he becomes cold and calculating and hard to the core.
In the end his brothers lose the real Curufin, replaced by a stranger.”

Yes, this exactly.  Curufin, the old Curufin, died long before his death, but I think all of his brothers kept nursing a kernel of hope until the end that he might come back one day, even tho they knew he never would without Celebrimbor and Feanor returned to him :(

 

I am glad you are enjoying the story!  



Name: Gabriel (Signed) · Date: June 21, 2017 7:30 · For: Chapter 3
Its good to see Caranthir and Curufin still have some semblance of a relationship at the beginning of this chapter, even if it pales in comparison to what they once had together.
Also I've noticed that you've made Caranthir so much like Feanor in character; obnoxious, arrogant with the view that no-one,{except his father and brothers}, is worth his time or attention, traits of young Feanor in {Revolutionary and Usurper}. I love that!
What's this whole thing Finrod? Curufin seemed to be slightly enamoured by him. But that could have been purely because Finrod was someone Curufin could chat to and argue a point with. Poor Caranthir constantly tormenting himself with Curufin. But in saying that, all of this anguish has lent Caranthir a great strength of character.
Feanor's death; still brings a tear to the eye and Curufin is not coping at all well, but then why would he having been so close to his father.
I love that Caranthir is quietly and secretly looking after the well-being of his brothers. But if he didn't who would, it's a case of having to, out of fear for them. Such a great character!
:)

Author's Response:

“Also I've noticed that you've made Caranthir so much like Feanor in character; obnoxious, arrogant with the view that no-one,{except his father and brothers}, is worth his time or attention, traits of young Feanor in {Revolutionary and Usurper}. I love that!

Yes, he is a lot like Feanor, isn’t he?  It is very hard to earn his respect, and he doesn’t bother with people who don’t see the world like he and his family do –so yes, a lot like Feanor in this regard.  I think it both hurt and benefited the Feanor’s sons to be raised largely away from those that had other view ideals/politics.  It stopped them from developing the ability to respect other’s opinions as much as they should, but it also protected them from the noxious environment of court life.  In Tirion, they would have forever been their father’s sons, and not in a good way.  Feanor had so many enemies, but he was also a prince, so his sons would have either been judged harshly or attracted sycophants.  They would have grown into far more cynical people, and manipulative, I think, and the bonds between them would have been weaker.  Actually, this is making me crave a story where the Feanorions were raised in court alongside Fingolfin’s kids, and see how that would have shaped them into different people….can you imagine Celegorm raised at court?  Caranthir?  And Maedhros and Curufin would have turned out badly, I fear.  Curufin, who is so self-defensive, protecting his tender insides by lashing out or shutting down, would not have handled such an environment well at all.  And Maedhros, who is a natural politician, deprived of the deep bonds of his family, would have grown into a colder more ruthless version of himself –more akin to the Maedhros post-Angband, only he wouldn’t have had that powerful love for his family to anchor his ambitions and ruthlessness.  Gosh, I want to read a fic with this, even though it would probably break my heart!  I don’t think I can handle Feanorions who don’t have strong family bonds.  It is like the most fundamental part of themselves!

“What's this whole thing Finrod? Curufin seemed to be slightly enamoured by him. But that could have been purely because Finrod was someone Curufin could chat to and argue a point with. 

Ah, well, it was a fleeting infatuation with someone beautiful and intelligent, but the Finrod of now isn’t a person who can hold Curufin’s interest because he’s too…hmm…he’s just lacking that depth of character that loss forged in him.  I think a lot of the Elves in Valinor were almost like children, not all, but those that had not experienced real grief or suffering or any really pain in their lives lacked the life experiences for them to grow into the next level of maturity.  Finrod in Valinor is clever and curious about the world, but his life so far has had a golden-touch. 

I love that Caranthir is quietly and secretly looking after the well-being of his brothers. But if he didn't who would, it's a case of having to, out of fear for them. Such a great character!

I love Caranthir in the background showing his love though his thoughtfulness too!  He is the solid support that holds up a slumping house with its sturdiness.

 

Thank you for the review!  I love to hear how much you are still enjoying the story!



Name: Gabriel (Signed) · Date: June 12, 2017 11:56 · For: Chapter 2
I loved Caranthir and Curufin's relationship in this chapter. Stuck to each other's side unpicking the world around them, together, and sharing in the conclusions they would inevitably come up with.
Just the family unity with Feanor and his sons makes you wish you were a part of it.
Your Feanor is just so delectable in this, I especially loved Feanor teaching Caranthir the art of Osanwe, so awesome. How you made it addictive, fantastic stuff, and Caranthir's secret desire for his brother, but outwardly pushing him away, really sad.
Really enjoying this story! :D

Author's Response:

I am thrilled to hear you are still enjoying the story :)

Just the family unity with Feanor and his sons makes you wish you were a part of it.

Oh, I know exactly what you mean!  They have such strong, unbreakable relationships.

“Your Feanor is just so delectable in this, I especially loved Feanor teaching Caranthir the art of Osanwe, so awesome. How you made it addictive, fantastic stuff, and Caranthir's secret desire for his brother, but outwardly pushing him away, really sad.

I love writing Father Feanor!  I think he was a great dad, so I love hearing that others like him too :)  And yes, poor Caranthir –and Curufin too—I wish Caranthir would just TELL him!  His fear of being rejected/making Curuifn disgusted with him, causes such wounds in his and Curufin’s life :(

 

Thank you so much for the review!!



Name: Gabriel (Signed) · Date: May 31, 2017 14:05 · For: Chapter 1
I'm sorry Encairion, I couldn't resist, I just had to read this new fic.
I love it when people write about Characters that don't get much of a mention.
Oh, dear dear Caranthir, one of my many favourite characters. I love him because he adds a wonderful level of antagonism and depth to a story already full of grief and anguish.
He never gives up never stops fighting, even when the world is crumbling around him.

Caranthir hadn't bothered listening to the fables about twins until his brothers were born. By now he was sick to death of hearing both the superstitions against them and those who looked at the twins with something akin to worship.
This tugged a laugh from me, it says a lot about Caranthir. The so bloody minded irritated and short tempered son of Feanor. It's just so him. And something else about word games his older brothers played with their father, he seems to find others enjoyment with things disgusting, I love him. 'Classic'.
But his relationship with Curufin was the one thing he really thrived on. The one bit of sunshine in his day that made every accusation every argument just melt away.
He's such an aloof character, there always seems to be such a great sense of sadness surrounding him because he's the odd brother out.
Fantastic! :)

Author's Response:

I'm sorry Encairion, I couldn't resist, I just had to read this new fic.

Oh my gosh you don’t have to apologize!  I love hearing what you thought of the new story :)

“He never gives up never stops fighting, even when the world is crumbling around him.

Yes this, exactly.  He never stops fighting, he never gives up, especially not on his family.  He is always there caring for them through the little things until the end.

This tugged a laugh from me, it says a lot about Caranthir. The so bloody minded irritated and short tempered son of Feanor. It's just so him. And something else about word games his older brothers played with their father, he seems to find others enjoyment with things disgusting, I love him. 'Classic'. 

Yep, that’s him to a T!  He doesn’t give a flip what anyone has to say, and has no time for fancy word games when blunt, practical ones will get the job done better.

But his relationship with Curufin was the one thing he really thrived on. The one bit of sunshine in his day that made every accusation every argument just melt away.

Curufin and his relationship was special out of all of his relationship with his brothers.  They really were close friends as well as brothers.  And it was always Curufin who could make him smile.  (This is making me sad all over again!)

 

Thank you so much for the review!  It was a pleasure to read :hugs:



Name: Caunedhiel (Signed) · Date: May 30, 2017 22:34 · For: Chapter 5
I always love your stories !! i would be very sad if you never published a story again, your works are amazing and the whole fanfic community would lose a great writer but i understand the feeling of having no inspiration/motivation to write, i hope it passes quickly.

I adore your sons of feanor, they feel so real and exactly how they should be. its uncanny and oh so enjoyable to read. ive never really thought about Caranthir much though, i guess he is one of the more background ones? if thats possible. i really love your tale of him though, i wanted him just to tell Curufin what he felt the whole time and really sad that he couldnt. i hope there is more to this tale and that you find inspiration for your other works

thanks for posting. much love Caunedhiel xx

Author's Response:

“I always love your stories !! i would be very sad if you never published a story again, your works are amazing and the whole fanfic community would lose a great writer but i understand the feeling of having no inspiration/motivation to write, i hope it passes quickly.

Thank you, thank you for these kind words!  Everyone has been so supportive of me, I don’t know how to repay all this love!  At least I can let you know that I caught the spark again as I was editing the new chapters for Price of Vengeance, and started writing again :) 

“I adore your sons of feanor, they feel so real and exactly how they should be. its uncanny and oh so enjoyable to read.

I love hearing this, thank you!  You have no idea how nervous the Feanorions used to make me.  I didn’t think I had the chops to write from their POVs –especially Feanor.  But then I finally took the plunge and have found them to be some of my fav character POVs ever to write from!  I never seem to get tired of thinking up new scenes for them :)

 i really love your tale of him though, i wanted him just to tell Curufin what he felt the whole time and really sad that he couldnt. i hope there is more to this tale and that you find inspiration for your other works 

I wanted him to tell Curufin so much too, it killed me not to let him tell him, even if only at that very last scene!  Even if Curufin was never able to return the romantic love, it would have been so much better for Caranthir to have admitted to it, to have explained why he had pushed Curufin away.  Curufin wouldn’t have looked at him in disgusted –like Caranthir feared—they could have been brothers again and best friends and healed.  BUT it is not over!  There is more to their story, it’s just not written yet.  This story, and Revolutionary and the Usurper are part of a larger series.  I am almost ready for the last installment of that series where everyone starts getting re-born (including Caranthir and Curufin)! I can’t wait :rubs hands together:

 

Thank you again so much for the wonderful review :hugs:



Name: ziggy (Signed) · Date: May 29, 2017 16:57 · For: Chapter 2

I love the way you have Feanor recognising each of his chaildren's talents and nurturing them, and knowing Caranthir's, he nurtures this as he does the others- perhaps giving him more of himself than any oher. Beaitifully done.



Author's Response:

Thank you!  I really see Feanor doing this.  He would pour all of himself into them if they needed it.  He even gave up his own work when they were young (if you remember from Revolutionary and Usurper).  Wherever their talent and passion lay, forge-work or not, he made it his goal to see them reach their full potential.



Name: ziggy (Signed) · Date: May 29, 2017 13:54 · For: Chapter 1

Oh mydRLING ENCAIRION! You are back!! Hurray!!! I havemissed your gorgeous worotng, your wonderful characterisation and intriguing narratives. But I guess you , like others, are feeling the fadom is slow, that only the die-hards remain and perhaps your interests are elsewhere now. But don't abando us completely just yet! You've got that story to tell and finish- at least just write out the plot so we all know what happens. It is too desperate not to!!

 

And this is a fic I have not been even aware of! 5 chapters posted and I've not read it yet. I have a soft spot for Caratnthir- he always seems to come out of things the worst and be the least talented and least attratcie of the brothers.

 

You hVE REALLY CAUGHT the moment of the disintegration of Feanor and Nerdanel so well in this: these lovely details:

Sometimes one of Celegorm’s ridiculous shenanigans was all that tugged a smile to Amrod’s quiet mouth. 

 

and this rather sad little note:  Caranthir wondered sometimes if she would mourn his absence as fiercely as she grieved for the loss of her work. 

 

But then you get these jewel-like moments- I thin the description and mages of the jungle are particualry fine- deep colour and texture, a sense of being very far away humid and damp, hot heat- green. I loved this:

They stretched out on slabs of mossy rock and let the heat dry their skin. Their bellies pressed into the yielding moss, their heads pillowed in their crossed arms, and faces turned to each other. 

And then the emotion of Carathir's forbidden desire lashes itself into this- so tumultous- but I really liked the very physical langauge, the sense of his turning himself inside out literally:

The universe upheaved inside his head, its backbone splitting open, pulling its guts up with it. He wanted to scream. He wanted to hurt something. He wanted to run back, pick Curufin up, and make him understand how sorry he was. But he wanted to press his mouth into Curufin’s too, wanted to learn what his brother’s body would feel like under his, so he didn’t stop running.


He was vicious, lashing out at Curufin, punishing him for not loving him back. Even though he knew Curufin couldn’t force his heart, still he cried out for its return. Curufin threw nasty words back, but not one of them hurt like Curufin’s arm about his wife’s waist or his head bent close to Celegorm in a secret language that Caranthir was barred from, nothing but an outsider looking in.

Great writing my dear.

Author's Response:

Hi Ziggy!  :waves:  I hope you have been doing well :)

Oh mydRLING ENCAIRION! You are back!! Hurray!!! I havemissed your gorgeous worotng, your wonderful characterisation and intriguing narratives. But I guess you , like others, are feeling the fadom is slow, that only the die-hards remain and perhaps your interests are elsewhere now. But don't abando us completely just yet! You've got that story to tell and finish- at least just write out the plot so we all know what happens. It is too desperate not to!!

It is good to be back!  It wasn’t lack of interest, or finding another fandom more interesting to write in, that kept me away, rather lack of writing motivation.  I actually feared I might never write again, but I have found the spark again :)  If I do ever decide I cannot continue the story to the end, I promise to post the remaining plot points.  I have the meat of it figured out :)

You hVE REALLY CAUGHT the moment of the disintegration of Feanor and Nerdanel so well

I am glad you think so :)  It must have been so hard for the boys to be in the middle of a failing marriage.  It can really damage a kid, especially in situations like this where it felt like their parents were fighting over and even through them.

“and this rather sad little note:  Caranthir wondered sometimes if she would mourn his absence as fiercely as she grieved for the loss of her work.”

Yes, it is sad, but I don’t think it’s true.  Caranthir has a skewed understanding of his mother because I think things between Feanor and her had been coming to a head for years.  She was a passionate craftswomen tho, just like Feanor, and it did wear on her and make her all the more impatient that she did not have the energy/inspiration (?) to keep up her work.

“And then the emotion of Carathir's forbidden desire lashes itself into this- so tumultous- but I really liked the very physical langauge, the sense of his turning himself inside out literally”

Ah!  I am glad you especially liked that part!  I really wanted to give the feel of his whole world coming apart!  I am glad it worked :)

 

Thank you so, so much for this lovely review!  And for welcoming me back so warmly!  You are a good friend :hugs:



Name: cheekybeak (Signed) · Date: May 29, 2017 3:29 · For: Chapter 1

Yet one could also argue that it was the way the Feanorions loved each other, that kind of love that would make them jump into a fire for their family, that had them swearing the Oath in the beginning.

Yes! This exactly!! It's like a chicken and the egg situation. They need that focused obsessive love to get them through the years in Arda but it was also that which lead them to their doom for without it it would have been so much easier for Maedhros to say, "No!" to his younger siblings..."you will not swear the oath." I think we have talked about this before. I deeply believe a lot of Maedhros' pain, ( and he has SO much pain) is because deep down he thinks he should have protected his brothers then when Feanor was so obviously mad....that he led them to their death as much as Feanor did because he did not speak against his father at that moment. 



Author's Response:

I have no doubt Maedhros bitterly regretted the Oath and not stopping his brothers, stopping all of them, from swearing it.  I have argued before that they did not truly understand what they were swearing too, but I doubt that now.  I don’t believe they ever envisioned actually killing anyone but Morgoth and his servants, but they knew what death looked like because of Finwe.  They were not children.  The Oath’s words are chilling, and they all said them with no sword at their throat forcing them.  And while Maedhros undoubtedly blamed himself, all of this brothers swore of their own free will (and I don’t think he was the first to step forward to do so –defiantly Curufin there—so it’s not like they were following their older brother’s example.  Each of the sons of Feanor made their own choice as an adult to swear the Oath.  And I think every one of the regretted it and blamed themselves for not doing, saying, SOMETHING to stop his brothers and father.

One thing I do believe though is that, as chilling and terrible as the words of the Oath are, they did not understand what kind of Oath it was.  I do not think they believed they were swearing a magical Oath, or whatever it was, that would FORCE them to its fulfillment.  Had any such Oath been swore before?  I think not.  I think they had no way of predicting that they would literally bind themselves to its fulfillment and could not break free.  I think they believed they swore an oath of honor, like Finrod swore, one that could be broken if they choose to forsake their honor (and they would have chosen to do so if they could have to stop the Kinslaying.  Better to be a man without honor than a murderer).

But I don’t want to dismiss their swearing of the Oath because it is a big part of their characters’ too.  They were all driven by revenge in that moment to swear an oath promising to kill for the Silmarils.  Which, when you think about how they had all watched Finwe be murdered and felt the terror of Ungoliant, is not shocking.  And they all choose to kill other people rather go into the Eternal Darkness (they couldn’t know where they would go in death).  But I think they choose to kill to protect their brothers more than out of any desire to save themselves (Curufin also wouldn’t have chosen death over killing before he believed if he/all of them died, they would never be able to rescue their father).

I think each of the Kinslayings were different too.  Alqualonde was confusion and panic and must-protect-my-family, and is actually the one I think the most defensible since they weren’t the ones to attack first (yes, they were stealing the ships, but the Teleri started throwing them overboard where they would have drowned wearing armor).  Now Doriath, well Doriath was years of bitterness and even hate come to a head.  Doriath was about all the Noldor who had died in the war while the Sindar hid, and about the Dwarven children and women who were slaughtered in the Sindar’s vengeance.  Was it even a Kinslaying if no one called each other kin?  Was it even attacking an ally when Doriath had been in cold war with them for centuries and no friend of theirs?  The Havens though were the worst, because it was a Haven.  A bunch of refuges of war, and some of them were the Sindar who the Feanorions truly hated at this point after Doriath and how many died on both sides, but some of them were not, and many of them were non-combatants.  It was the Havens that showed just how far the Feanorions had fallen, and how enslaved they were to the Oath.  We heard in cannon how much they did not want to go there, how long they fought the Oath, but it drove them on in the end.  I wonder if they had not fought so hard until it wrapped too tightly about their necks to be denied, if they had gone after the Silmaril soon after Doriath, would they have had enough sanity/free will left to have chosen say, an assassination retrieval rather than an all-out battle?

 

As much as I love the Feanorions and am biased towards their side of things, I do realize they killed a lot of innocent people.  But morally ambiguous characters have always been my favorites :)  People like Idril or Beren or the Vanyar who are always shown making the ‘right’ choices, bore me.  I’d much rather write about a character’s descent into atrocities than a healthy couple in love.



Name: mangacrack (Signed) · Date: May 28, 2017 22:46 · For: Chapter 5

Caranthir is the backbone of that family. The quiet one who doesn't mind being patient and listen to the drama going on around him. Does it fits somehow that he's the middle child in all of this. Not that he minds, I guess. He just turned into a private person.

 

... otherwise: don't feel guilty for not writing! I've learned to let go of the notion that free days / hours HAVE to be used to work on a story. because in the end, it IS work. I can just as well fill my time with books, stories or research.

Forcing myself to write doesn't work for me. Certainly not after work or when 4pm is through. So take it easy, have you back reviewing and posting little stuff is enough for me.

besides I've learned how to be patient. If it takes months for a new chapter, than I can wait.



Author's Response:

Caranthir is the backbone of that family.

My first response was: yes, so much!  But then I thought about Maedhros and how essential he was too.   And Celegorm who was Caranthir’s complement in a lot of ways.  They were both the brothers who looked after the others, and both were needed.  If Caranthir was the backbone, Celegorm was the shield at their backs, and Maedhros the sword.

 

I agree with you so much about writing!  I have struggled for years with equating my self-worth with whether or not I was writing, and that is so destructive.  These last few months were the first time since I started writing that I stopped and didn’t want to beat myself up over it.  That was why I didn’t think I was coming back, it felt like I had finally freed myself from it, even though it is something I love.  But working on it again so far has been good, and I did miss that euphoria that comes with feeling like I did really good job with a scene.  I am just hoping that the self-hate for not writing every moment of every day doesn’t come back too.



Name: cheekybeak (Signed) · Date: May 28, 2017 20:30 · For: Chapter 1

I love the picture of Caranthir. Still beautiful but flawed also. Not the perfect beauty of the others. 

I feel sorry for Caranthir....always overlooked, a real middle child, surronded by brilliant older and younger brothers with nothing of his own to make him shine. (Except he does. He does have his own specialness but it is not particularly valued by himself or others.)

His relationship (or non relationship) with Curufin makes me uncomfortable I have to say. It feels as if it is just a symptom of some real unhappiness on his part. It feels unhealthy......a desperation for a connection because he is adrift within the family, because Caranthir feels invisible, even to his own siblings and parents. It's like he is so desperate for that connection it warps his feelings for Curufin. 

I do remember Feanor handled Caranthir's confession of this quite well but I wish he had been brave enough to confess his own deep attraction to Fingolfin. That knowledge alone would have eased Caranthir's self loathing. But Feanor wasn't brave enough....I don't think he was even brave enough to admit it to himself at that point and so he failed his son. (At least from memory he didn't tell Caranthir the details of that longing) 

Caranthir makes me sad and I would like to see him find the self belief to break free, but I know you see it differently! Sometimes I find the Feanorions quite insular and suffocating and for Caranthir especially. I think he, of all of them, needs to find his identity and self worth away from his family. It feels like Caranthir needs someone who doesn't see him as one amongst many, someone who sees him as something special just for his own merits, as a jewel for his own sake, seperate from his Feanorian blood. Someone who doesn't "need" to love him because he is family. Someone who loves him without a family bond, simply because he is Caranthir, not Caranthir Feanorion. 

so good to read new writing from you. I have missed it! 



Author's Response:

“I love the picture of Caranthir. Still beautiful but flawed also. Not the perfect beauty of the others. 

Yes, this exactly!  He is not a typical Elven beauty (just like his mother, I think), and yet he is still beautiful.

I cannot thank you enough for this review, it really made me think.  I remember talking to you a lot about Caranthir, Curufin, and Finrod, and how I was wavering, not knowing which direction to take, but I think with distance now between me and the writing, I can see all the points you pointed out.  Caranthir’s romantic desire for Curufin is unhealthy, because I think you are right, it is a manifestation of his own insecurities.  He loves Curufin so much as his brother, but I think he worries about his place in Curufin’s heart, especially as they are growing older and others are claiming Curufin’s attention.  I think it is hard for Caranthir to see exactly how much his brothers’ loved him.  (I don’t think he doubted Feanor’s love, because they shared a special connection).  But Curufin was the brother he was closest to, and when Curufin started to grow up and find different interests and more than just Caranthir as a friend, it planted fear in Caranthir of loosing Curufin.

I think the best ending for these two is for Caranthir to come to understand how much his family loves him, and for that they need to understand what he’d been feeling.  Seriously, the Feanorions are going to be having a lot of hearts-to-hearts when they are reborn lol

“Caranthir makes me sad and I would like to see him find the self belief to break free, but I know you see it differently! Sometimes I find the Feanorions quite insular and suffocating and for Caranthir especially.”

Well, I do agree that the Feanorions are insular, defiantly.    

I wonder if things had gone differently for them, if they had never left Valinor, if some of them might have grown to want some distance?  But after the Oath and Kinslaying, well, I think they needed those bonds of love that were almost too much because they felt surrounded by enemies (and were in a lot of ways).  They needed that absolute trust that their brothers would never betray them or forsake them.  And after the Battle of Unnumbered Tears the immense love that almost seemed suffocating was all they had to fight the Oath with, it was only the strength of their love for their brothers that kept them going.  Yet one could also argue that it was the way the Feanorions loved each other, that kind of love that would make them jump into a fire for their family, that had them swearing the Oath in the beginning.

“I think he, of all of them, needs to find his identity and self worth away from his family. It feels like Caranthir needs someone who doesn't see him as one amongst many, someone who sees him as something special just for his own merits, as a jewel for his own sake, seperate from his Feanorian blood. Someone who doesn't "need" to love him because he is family. Someone who loves him without a family bond, simply because he is Caranthir, not Caranthir Feanorion. 

This made me think immediately of the pairing I was thinking about for him (before I became so indecisive about Curufin/Finrod!).  I haven’t written it yet, but I hope that by the end he can feel loved for who he is :)

“I do remember Feanor handled Caranthir's confession of this quite well but I wish he had been brave enough to confess his own deep attraction to Fingolfin. That knowledge alone would have eased Caranthir's self loathing. But Feanor wasn't brave enough....I don't think he was even brave enough to admit it to himself at that point and so he failed his son. (At least from memory he didn't tell Caranthir the details of that longing) 

I couldn’t remember either if Feanor told Caranthir about Fingolfin, so I had to go back and check.  Actually, he did (that kind of surprised me, but then I remembered that he would do anything, even speak of his most painful hurts and disappointments if it would help his sons).  I think, for Caranthir, after Feanor helped him accept that he was not a monster for desiring Curufin, that it was more the terror of loosing Curufin’s love entirely, or hearing from Curufin’s lips that he was disgusted, that held him back from speaking.  I do wish though that he had spoken in Valinor.  I think he believed, and rightly, that after Feanorion died it was too late for that kind of love.  But Caranthir still should have explained himself, and told Curufin why he had hurt him and rejected him, not because Caranthir was looking to gain a lover, but because Curufin needed his brother back.  Curufin never really got Caranthir back though.  Caranthir cared for him from the shadows, when Curufin needed to be loved like Feanor loved him: lots of reassurances and words of love.  No one loved Curufin like that after Feanor died.

Thank you so much for this review!  I feel like you have helped me see deeper into Caranthir’s character, and see things I hadn’t noticed fully before.  Reviews like these are such a gift!

 

 



Name: mangacrack (Signed) · Date: May 28, 2017 16:36 · For: Chapter 5

Thank you for sharing the story with us. I know what it's like to sit before a piece that just doesn't seem ready or finished but on the other hand ... there's so much work in there already, it'd be a waste not to share it. For my part ... I loved it. Caranthir is a dear, someone who just doesn't get enough attention. And like everything else in the First Age ... he's hurting. It's not easy, loving Curufin. But he does and I LOVE HIM FOR LOVING CURUFIN. No matter how ... cruel Curufin might get, and no matter if Caranthir's love isn't enough to bring him back in the end, it still counts.

*wants to hug those boys and make them happy*

What I liked most was the end, I guess. It fits that Caranthir follows his brothers. It takes more than death to pry Caranthir away from his family.

And I really hope you keep writing? You're an amazing author and it be a tragedy to loose you and your stories.



Author's Response:

Thank you for sharing the story with us. I know what it's like to sit before a piece that just doesn't seem ready or finished but on the other hand ... there's so much work in there already, it'd be a waste not to share it.

Ah, I know!  And it’s hard to just scrap things because of how much work and time has been invested into them.  I actually have word documents with thousands of words of things I’ve cut but couldn’t bear to delete entirely.

You are so right that Caranthir doesn’t get enough attention!  (and most of what he does get seems to be stories with Haleth.  I can’t say I have any interest in that pairing).  I am so pleased to hear you enjoyed the story!

What I liked most was the end, I guess. It fits that Caranthir follows his brothers. It takes more than death to pry Caranthir away from his family.

I liked the idea of him being so pig-headedly stubborn and loving his brothers so fiercely that not even the Valar could pry him from them.  Unlike some of his other brothers, like Maedhros and Curufin, Caranthir had enough of himself left to fight the call of Mandos.  And I image Curufin and Celegorm dying within moment of each other and Celegorm following his brother to Mandos (he could have been another one who I could see fighting Mandos to stay with his family).  Feanor didn’t have a chance, the Valar never would have stopped fighting to have him, he was their ultimate prize.

“And I really hope you keep writing? You're an amazing author and it be a tragedy to loose you and your stories.

Thank you!  It is so nice to hear your warm words :hugs:  I actually thought I might have lost the passion to write for months.  Unlike other times when I disappeared, this time was different because I didn’t have any drive to keep writing (those other times it was mental illness more than lack of will).  But as I am going through editing the Price of Vengeance chapters, I have been feeling the spark!  Ideas have been coming again, at long last, and the itch to write!  It is such a wonderful, missed feeling.

 

Thank you so much for the review and the unwavering support.  That you, and others, were here ready to welcome me back is the greatest gift :hugs:



Name: Spiced Wine (Signed) · Date: May 28, 2017 12:31 · For: Chapter 5
Well this was amazing. Heartbreaking, tragic, powerful and gut wrenching. I do not think anyone has ever written this house as you do, and I am so very glad that you do, as I have always wanted to read it. I am so glad that you have done some more writing, it was such a treat and very much needed for me at this time. Wow!

Author's Response:

I am so sorry to hear you have been unwell, Spiced :hugs:  But glad the story could help even just a little.

I cannot imagine loving writing another family as I do the Feanorions.  It makes me ridiculously happy every time I get to hear that you enjoyed my writing of them, for as much as I loved them in cannon, I fell in love with them a second time reading your own stories :)

 

Thank you so much for the review!  I will pray that things will get better for you soon :hugs:



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