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The Magnificent Faerie Advent Calendar 2018 by cheekybeak Teen
It’s that time again. What is in store for us when Aragorn drags half of Minas Tirith to Imladris for Yule? 
Angels and crooks by Nuredhel General Audiences
Bard and Thran has gotten used to their new life but they do still have their jobs and my oh my does that make things interesting...
~ Magnificat of the Damned. Book IV: Anvil ~ by Spiced Wine Mature
From Angmar to the Dagor Dagorath. The final story in the Magnificat of the Damned series. The Doom and destiny of the...
Borderlands by Marchwriter General Audiences
Better, Nellas said to herself and the trees who listened, to remain apart from Men. Better so than to become entangled in...
Be All My Sins Remembered by Marchwriter Teen
Wisdom is hard bought — more often by bitter experience than any sort of grace. While hunting in the wilderlands of Beleriand...
Oasis by Marchwriter Mature
On the verge of perishing in the desert after a fruitless search, a determined Elrohir locates a caravan of Easterlings...
West of the Dark East of the Sun by Marchwriter Teen
Determined to clear Ithilien of the enemy, Faramir is forced to decide the fate of a stranger trespassing in Gondor's realm.

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Guests: 19


12/17/18 10:11 pm
Congratulations to Alpha. So well deserved - her books are amazing.
12/17/18 09:31 pm
Hope I've fixed the chapters now all. Well done to Alpha!! Blimey- good for her!
12/16/18 01:24 am
Thank you for that Spiced! It sounds really intriguing. A great Christmas present. :)
Spiced Wine
12/15/18 10:19 pm
I have the paperbacks as I don’t like Kindle too much
Spiced Wine
12/15/18 10:19 pm
Path of a Novice and Road of a Warrior by R.K. Lander — it will be a trilogy
12/15/18 09:52 pm
Wow! Congratulations to Alpha Ori, Spiced! I didn't even know she'd written a book. Good for her! Here's hoping she wins many more. What's the name of her book(s)?
Spiced Wine
12/15/18 07:23 pm
Alpha Ori’s won a Best Indy Book Award in Fantasy and Paranormal! So very proud of her!
12/15/18 05:36 pm
It was lovely, Ziggy. Can't believe we are 10 days from Christmas already! Ch 15 posted!
12/15/18 02:31 pm
Sounds lush, Nelya- I have just taken my horses out in the pouring rain and wind for a quick zip round the lanes-we're all soaked! But happy.
Spiced Wine
12/15/18 12:32 pm
That sounds delightful on a foggy and chilly day!
Shout Archive

Name: ebbingnight (Signed) · Date: November 11, 2017 3:33 · For: Chapter 14 The Lost Shores of Memory
Bainalph... a wraith? We saw it coming, but it's still like a knife to the heart, to see someone so loving, houseless so long from having loved so hard and so hopelessly.

Author's Response: I know, poor Bainalph, :( it made me so sad writing that. Thank you, Ebbingnight

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: November 05, 2017 0:57 · For: Chapter 13 Blood Of My Soul
I was so happy to come home to this. I'm super jet-lagged, so apologies in advance if I start wittering nonsense.

Maglor's grief over Van is really affecting - although shortly afterwards you gave us this, which I adored:

It was Maglor who moved first, ramming his sword back into its housing, striding toward him, eyes as silver as the stars spun out of Vanimórë's imagination (or memory) and a face like an ice-storm. He hit Vanimórë with a perfect, devastating right-cross that staggered him, and then stepped back.

'Well, good, thou didst feel that, I was beginning to wonder if thou wert real,' he flared

I couldn't help snorting. After everything these two have been through together, a happy reunion wouldn't work - of course Maglor would react this way. And Van's entrance was particularly dramatic. His time outside the universe seems to have turned him into even more of a showman.

The moment with Vanya was beautiful. Knowing now what Sauron is in your 'verse, it feels appropriate that his daughter takes on the "Mother Earth" role that Dana stole for a while.

The history you hint at between Fëanor and Ingwë intrigued me - have you written about this anywhere else? I was sad about Finwë though, and his refusal to meet Edenel. Do the Valar still have a grip on him?

On a totally different note, I watched Thor 3 this afternoon, and more than anything it made me want to go and re-read the crossover fic you wrote with Loki and Van, so that's my next port of call :)

Author's Response: I hope you had a lovely time, Narya, and can get over your jet lag. :)

Lol, you are right. Vanimórë and Maglor are never going to have a 'peaceful' relationship :)

Vanya was always supposed to be this, and time is no constraint to her any more. Back in Magnificat III she put out the fire bowls in Danas temple in Sud Sicanna. She will have true freedom .

Re: Finwë - in Magnificat III, Vanimórë did speak to Finwë in Valinor about Edenel. Of course Finwë was shocked and pained, but mostly we have it from Edenel's perspective. Fëanor has never said very much about Finwë, as far as I remember. Finwë chose not to come to Middle-earth. I am not sure the Valar have a hold on him so much as the entire 'atmosphere' of Valinor through thousands of years acts like a slow 'bleach' on most of them there.

Oh, Kev saw Thor 3 last week and enjoyed it very much :)
Thank you so much for writing a comment when you were so jet-lagged :)

Name: ebbingnight (Signed) · Date: November 04, 2017 22:29 · For: Chapter 13 Blood Of My Soul
Her "mantle": yes, of course. Lovely.

Author's Response: :) Thank you, Ebbingnight

Name: ebbingnight (Signed) · Date: November 04, 2017 3:04 · For: Chapter 13 Blood Of My Soul
Vanya's reappearance was deeply satisfying: I had always worried about her fate (not as much as Van, of course) and wondered why she had to suffer so much as a seemingly minor character. Now that we understand WHO she is, this makes much more sense (and Dana's usurpation of her role much more damnable). Van's being so drawn to who he thought Dana was makes perfect sense as well, since Vanya truly does represent what Dana only pretended to be. It's also fitting that Sauron's daughter should be the earth goddess, given what we now know that he is. And, finally, of course Vanya has ALWAYS been held in Van's heart: but only now can he accept what she tells him, that she was always with him and always will be. Like the revelation that Elgalad is not who he seemed to be, this revelation about Vanya puts a whole new light on important parts of the story. (And, of course, the rest of the chapter is brilliant, but Vanya was the true surprise--- to everyone present in the story, not just to me!)

Author's Response: Thank you, Ebbingnight. Vanya always did have this destiny, which, yes, does explain why Vanimórë was always so sure there was a 'Mother' - it was just not Dana. But probably she did know, or guess, that was Vanya's role ultimately, if Vanya could possibly have escaped, or gone with Vanimórë into the south when they were both young. He was called back, of course, but it might have been different for Vanya, perhaps she could have become part of the Earth much earlier, truly escaped, and perhaps Sauron would not have even considered drawing her back, since it was Vanimórë he was focussed on. Well, now Vanya can take on her 'mantle'. She can become what she always should have been.

Name: PoppyMarie (Signed) · Date: November 03, 2017 18:50 · For: Chapter 13 Blood Of My Soul

So. Many. Paradoxes. I keep trying to keep track of everything in my head, but now I have to question everything! Van's entrance here was perfect, so dramatic and flashy, so very like Feanor, who of course is his Grandfather/son? Its all a giant jumble now, so difficult to sort out lol. :) I am loving all of the interactions, you do them so well, and to see all of these charaters finally confronting one another, I love it!  I wonder if FInwe will ever confront Edenel, or if anything will happen to make him see past his jelousy. 

I am so looking forward to seeing more of these charaters interact, I wonder what will happen when Feanor meets Arafinwe and of course Sauron, who is also sort of his Grandfather. Of course Celebrimbor and Sauron, I think that will be most interesting, and will we get to see Thranduil and Bainaph again? I can't wait to see whats coming next. Especially now that Sauron has a silmaril, I don't think thats going to go over well. 

I love this, it just keeps getting better! Thanks for writing! 

Author's Response: I know, it's all 'quantum' and even physicist don't understand it, :)

I'm so glad you liked it :) We shall see what happens, and I am writing at the moment. (I doubt Sauron is going to keep the Silmaril. I doubt Vanimórë would let him)

Name: ebbingnight (Signed) · Date: October 28, 2017 6:00 · For: Chapter 12 From The Outside
I too am curious about Vanya now that Móriel has been found. Of course Van would send Elgalad on this mission: despite everything, whom else would he trust?

Author's Response: Well, we will see what happens with Vanya next chapter :) I've already written it. :)
Van would send Elgalad of course, being unable to go himself until he's back 'in' the world. And yes, of course he would trust him :) Thank you, ebbingnight

Name: PoppyMarie (Signed) · Date: October 18, 2017 1:07 · For: Chapter 12 From The Outside

Oh yes! This was great, I always love Mairon POV, its strange to see him almost upset at the thought of Vanimore being gone, I wonder what he might have flet if Van truly was gone. I loved the interaction between him and Elgalad, and him and Van. I can't wait to see what will happen to him in the future, this will be the first time we really get to see him interact with others when he is no longer in control of the situation. I still wonder if he can really feel any genuine emotion, or if he is just fixated on getting "his" world back. I can't wait to see what happens between him and Celebrimbor, not to mention the rest of the Feanorians; I can't imagine its going to be a peaceful meeting, though I have a feeling he still has a job to do in the upcoming battle. 

There is so much here, the way that things are coming together, its beautiful how everything is connected. Now Moriel is waking up! I wonder, will we get to see Vanya soon? 

I am so relieved that Dana is gone, and Van is so incredible in his power now! I really hope he gets some time to speak with Elgalad, there is a lot there that needs to be worked through. I am glad to see that Van doesn't hate him, but there is clearly a lot of hurt buried under his calm exterior.

I cannot wait for what comes next!  

Author's Response: I wonder with Sauron, too, he is so complex :)
Yes, I am writing what happens to Vanya :)
I'm so glad that you liked this, Poppy :) Yes, Van does need time to work through what happened with Elgalad and though he does have time, technically, he just feels that he has other things to do at the moment

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: October 16, 2017 22:59 · For: Chapter 12 From The Outside
Oh my God, there is so much I love about this! The interaction between Elgalad and Sauron - that is a power dynamic I never expected to see, and I enjoyed it immensely.

No-one but a god could enter the adamantine gates. Mairon regarded them, then gestured to Elgalad.
'Shall we?'

I can see this so clearly. I wish we could film your stories somehow.

Mairon's love and admiration for his son, twisted as it is, becomes more and more apparent. And goodness me, this:

There was movement in the gaping doorway, a surge of darkness; two gigantic legs, spined with hair like sword-thorns, pushed out into the wintry light. There was a glint of oil-black eyes, deathly and emotionless yet filled with a rapacious hunger and, Mairon was sure, terror. Green fluid dripped from a wickedly curving beak, smoked as it splashed on the stones.

Phenomenal description. The hairs on my arms were standing on end, and I literally shuddered as I read it. And I don't even mind spiders usually ;-)

Dana, pulling herself from her wounded 'mother'.

'You would not kill a woman, Vanimórë,' she pleaded, holding out her arms. 'She is not me.. She trapped me.

*Shudders* I can't believe I didn't realise the link between Ungoliant and Dana. It fits so perfectly.

Elgalad flung a burning look at Mairon. 'I am not him. I should never have agreed to do what I did. I deserve thy hate.'

'I could never hate Elgalad,' Vanimórë murmured. 'But art thou him? Was he even real?'

'I do not know,' Elgalad whispered. 'I never knew. There is no-one else.'

Ach, you're breaking my heart with these two. Still, at least you give us this lovely moment:

He turned toward the doors, then spun back on his heel, caught Vanimórë's face between both hands and kissed him, hard and long. Then, quickly, he drew back, and walked away without a word.

*Melts* the change in the power dynamic between them now that Elgalad is his "true" self is fascinating - and hot.

I'm so excited for the final showdown. It must be an amazing experience for you as an author to be writing this part of the story, with all the years you've worked towards it. *Hugs* I hope the swift update this time means you're feeling better?

Author's Response: Thank you, Narya. The last time Sauron and Elgalad met was in Dark God, when he was Sauron's prisoner for a time, so yes, this was a rather different meeting, but you can't easily phaze Sauron.
I so very glad you enjoyed this :) And yes, it's satisfying really, to come all this way and get to this place in the story; I'm really quite surprised I managed to do it.
And thank you, I am feeling a bit better and taking each day as it comes.

Name: PoppyMarie (Signed) · Date: October 15, 2017 22:08 · For: Chapter 11 Time Was. Time Is. Time Is Past

This was incredible, it was so unexpected, and yet it makes so much sense. I have been turing it over and over in my head, thinking about all of the possiblites, but I know that it would take pages to say everything I want to say. It was mindbending in a good way! 

First we have the horror of everyones reactions to Van attempt to destroy himslef, even Sauron seems schoked. That was very painful, and the chapter seemed to be moving in a rather hopeless direction. I do hope he comes to know how much Elgalad loves him :( 

So Van is keeping all of the Noldor's souls safe inside himself? That is so very him. I love how its Maglor that can feel something is not right, it speaks to the connection they have, and how deep the bond runs. Its kind of creepy, its like another Valinor, this is clearly a better cage, but a cage nonetheless. 

Vanimore. Created. Melkor. Wow, that hit me out of nowhere, how did that idea emerge? Its amazing, tragic, fanstastic twist. Also his passion fed into the Noldor?!?! It all makes sense now! I hope this will make him think a little more highly of himself, his fire in a sense created their own. All of his beautiful family included. 

Lastly, I can't wait to see them all work together against Melkor, you have so many storylines going its going to be a hell of a show! I was also left with a feeling of foreboding, and a faint sliver of hope, it seems like Van has got his fight back! 

As usual I would wait years for this story, and Im so gald to see an update! Thank you!!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Poppy Marie :) I think Vanimórë himself needs time to think, to be honest, about Elgalad, and about everything, really. And yes, he wanted so much just to keep the Noldor safe, not to let them go off to face Ungoliant, and yet they cannot remain there, like Valinor it would smother them.
I suppose the idea about Melkor was hovering there for a long time, and yes, he (Vanimórë) did pour his passion, his fire, even I suppose his tragedy, into the Noldor. and I think you'll find he has definitely got his fight back - and I doubt you'll have to wait long for the next update :) I am already well into the chapter. Again, thank you so much. these reviews have encouraged me so much

Name: ziggy (Signed) · Date: October 14, 2017 20:15 · For: Chapter 11 Time Was. Time Is. Time Is Past

I am a bit blown by this, Spiced. You have moved so far from fanfic and into the realms of original, stunning fiction, that Tolkien must have exploded!

So vanimore created the situation of Valinor in a way? In new cuivenen - being as stifling and closed as Valinor. And so they will rebel, as they did before and it all starts again...but this is a new version? So THIS time, it could be different?


The Dagor Dagoret -again, in this version (like QM having endless versions), MIGHT succeed- but has Vanimore been in every version (do you understnad what I mean by version- earlier, Eru  revealed that this Arda was not the first)- am I getting this right?

Breath-taking and brilliant, Spiced. Your imagination surpasses anything I have read in any fanfic certainly and rivals some of the great fantasy and sci-fi writers.

Author's Response: Lol, Ziggy, you've actually jumped ahead of me a bit. :D At the moment, the Noldor are enclosed, but Vanimórë won't leave them there; I think he sees what you think, that they would feel the same kind of madness of imprisonment.

But yes...although I haven't really written it yet, there have been other 'versions' of Arda - Vanimórë just has not caught up with YOU yet, in what that might possibly mean!

Aww, thank you so much - I don't think it is that good myself, by the scope of the characters seem to pull me into an 'epic' story:)

Name: ebbingnight (Signed) · Date: October 08, 2017 19:30 · For: Chapter 11 Time Was. Time Is. Time Is Past
Interesting that this feels more "right" than the much earlier version, despite the paradoxes here, which means that I'll have to re-adjust my interpretation as a constant reader of the 'verse. (Can paradoxes be "interpreted", I wonder? Perhaps not, but I think there are even more twists to come, as they reveal themselves to you... and, eventually, to us.)

And I'm very glad you're back, speaking of that communal feeling that someone essential was missing!!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Ebbingnight :) You have been so very patient. I did have a lot of trouble, not only with health issues, but also work is so very busy, and I was writing when I could, but not happy with it, when I suddenly knew what I had to write, so hypothetically had to virtually scrap everything I had written. So I am glad this 'feels' more right. :)

Name: Caunedhiel (Signed) · Date: October 08, 2017 0:53 · For: Chapter 11 Time Was. Time Is. Time Is Past
Aww a happy surprise getting to read a new chapter from you this evening! Very interesting twist , I wonder if morgoths interest in van were subconsciously because of these events

Please keep posting ! This arc is one of my most favourite fanfics :)

Author's Response: Oh, you're kind, Caunedhiel :) Thank you! I am so glad you're still enjoying reading it

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: October 07, 2017 22:04 · For: Chapter 11 Time Was. Time Is. Time Is Past
Maglor dived into the abyss on a tide of music, a harp that played itself. He reached within for the truth and spun it forth in gold. He sang of what should be, not what was, of grief and love, and passion and eternal defiance of the dark. The chamber resonated with it as he followed his father and Glorfindel into the depths.

Vanimórë's mind.

Oh my God, this is amazing writing. Just beautiful description.

Elgalad, recognisably Elgalad, and yet not. Harder, steel rather than silver, blazing with power. The face of a god.

As is this. Seeing Elgalad uncloaked at last is truly awesome, and Maglor finally admitting that he loves as well as hates Van, and can't let him go, is gut wrenching.

The Noldor stuck in their too-perfect world is wonderfully creepy.

Light and flame erupted, hurling itself outward into that which was not. Where there had been nothing save his mind and Eru's. He locked both together, reached in, and ripped the Melkor-soul out, felt its cry reverberate across unfolding Time. It was cruel and necessary. And of course, with that savage birth Melkor could never have been other than he was.

Oh. OH! Van created him! Van created Melkor! I didn't see that coming at all, but it feels utterly perfect. And the Noldor too!

I love the paradox set up here. No need to apologise for the wait - it was well worth it. Hugs.

Author's Response: Oh, I am so glad you liked this, Narya. I wailed when I literally had to scrap what I had written, but this just exploded into me, and so I had to write it. Thank you!

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 22, 2017 22:15 · For: Chapter 10 Abyss
“Two swords,” Glorfindel said. “Two weapons.”

“Morgoth's weapon.” Fëanor stepped to Vanimórë's side, laid a hand on his son's shoulder. “Or Eru's.”


The scene of Van's torture is so awful. It reminds me of those medieval paintings of souls in hell - utterly horrific.

Diamond fire exploded in the chamber, and the solar-roar of Glorfindel's golden power. His hand met Fëanor's over the wreck of Vanimórë's body. Their fingers interlaced. At the last moment, Maglor's hand came down on theirs.

I love that - at the last moment Maglor joins the rescue mission.

I hope you keep feeling better, Spiced. Sending you lots of good wishes!

Author's Response: I m so glad you liked this, Narya :) And I thank you for your good wishes :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 22, 2017 22:00 · For: Chapter 9 ~ Life Is The Anvil ~
“Thou doth deserve so much better.” He drew a hand down Bainalph's cheek.

“Do I? I began this. Perhaps I deserve exactly this.” His smile was cold.

Oh, Bainalph. Will wee see more of him and Thranduil, now that you're moving towards the concluding cycle of your story? Or will you focus mainly on the Noldor from here?

I really enjoyed the dynamic between Elgalad and Fëanor too. It's interesting to see Elgalad's relationships through a different lens, now that we know his true nature. There is a real equality between him and Fëanor here. Heck, Elgalad even seems to know and understand Eru better than (or at least as well as) Eru knows himself.

Author's Response: I am not sure yet, Narya. I do have to concentrate on other characters, but I dare say I shall write more in time. I am glad you liked Elgalad and Fëanor and yes, I think Elgalad has been close to Eru longer than any other, and so does perhaps understand him quite a lot. Thank you so much :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 22, 2017 21:22 · For: Chapter 8 ~ The Veil ~
OK, Take 2, the site had a bit of a meltdown...

The grandest of illusions, Sauron had called the world, and Vanimórë had not understood, then. Now, he did. He could have spent an eternity studying the structure of each atom but, as he dragged himself clear of the temptation, he also comprehended why a god's view of Arda could never be his own. And he did not want it to be. His father, even Melkor, had preferred form, to live in the world. Of course they had. He also, in a flash, felt the horror of existence without a body, why the Elves loathed the ancient tales which prophesied that they would, eventually, fade into spirit alone.

I love your writing so much. Your Eru is utterly fascinating - much more human and fallible than I had imagined.

“Thou art not going to fail,” Eru murmured. “Not at the last.” He moved back, raised his arms. The palace fled away; they stood in infinity, where galaxies trailed pinwheel arms, and black holes sucked in suns. Vast wings of diamond and ebony snapped up and spanned Time. Everything was within Eru and of him. And he hung like a man crucified upon Eternity.

I'm sorry that I don't have sensible words to express my feelings about this chapter. I've read it a couple of times now and I can't get over the beautiful, subtle nuances in the dialogue between the two of them, the power shifts, and the mythical imagery. I know how long you've worked on this, I just want you to know how much I still love it. You've made me think about canon in a completely new way.

Author's Response: I'm so pleased you still like this, Narya. That people still read me means more to me than anything, especially since I've been writing this series for over then years now. It amazes me people still read it, so thank you again :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 22, 2017 21:20 · For: Chapter 8 ~ The Veil ~
The grandest of illusions, Sauron had called the world, and Vanimórë had not understood, then. Now, he did. He could have spent an eternity studying the structure of each atom but, as he dragged himself clear of the temptation, he also comprehended why a god's view of Arda could never be his own. And he did not want it to be. His father, even Melkor, had preferred form, to live in the world. Of course they had. He also, in a flash, felt the horror of existence without a body, why the Elves loathed the ancient tales which prophesied that they would, eventually, fade into spirit alone.

I love your writing so much

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 22, 2017 21:20 · For: Chapter 8 ~ The Veil ~
The grandest of illusions, Sauron had called the world, and Vanimórë had not understood, then. Now, he did. He could have spent an eternity studying the structure of each atom but, as he dragged himself clear of the temptation, he also comprehended why a god's view of Arda could never be his own. And he did not want it to be. His father, even Melkor, had preferred form, to live in the world. Of course they had. He also, in a flash, felt the horror of existence without a body, why the Elves loathed the ancient tales which prophesied that they would, eventually, fade into spirit alone.

I love your writing so much

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 16, 2017 10:18 · For: Chapter 7 ~ The Eve of Departure ~
“It is always strange to speak to the man who put a dagger through my heart.” Celebrimbor turned from the balcony and came across to the couch. “Although I was not being politic when I said I thanked thee for it. I never was very politic.”

Ahh, that scene :-( I will have to go back and re-read, knowing now that they're family.

He is a master game-player.

That he is...and I wonder what he has planned for the very end of this game...

“I see. It was nothing to do with how thou doth look.”

The look he received was a twinkle of amusement. He knew he was stunning.

I've always loved the interplay between Van and Fëanor - and now it has another layer to it, the complexity of the family relationship. No wonder Fëanor always seemed to understand Van, and also know which buttons to press.

Fëanor's fingers slipped up his arm, tracing the black tattoos and leaving fire in their wake.

Just gorgeous.

Author's Response: I think Celebrimbor and Sauron have to meet again, don't you? Yes, I suppose the relationship between Van and Fëanor explains a lot about them; they're not the same, of course, but they 'recognise' each other :) Thank you so much again :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 15, 2017 22:25 · For: Chapter 6 ~ Stars That Bloom On The Edge Of Night ~
The Balrog folded as if hammered in the gut, spittle and blood flying from his mouth. His eyes bulged. Flesh tore and innards were sucked out of the gaping hole that appeared in his sternum. They streamed toward Eru's waiting hand and vanished as if drawn inward. Slowly, horribly, Gothmog began to collapse into himself, his shrieks skirling higher and higher. Skin peeled, organs exploded. He was a monstrous blooded skeleton for a moment, until bones snapped broke, crumbled – and were gone.

Phenomenal description. You convey the presence of Eru - the awe-inspiring nature of him, the fact that even Urphiel can't fully comprehend him - perfectly. And what a fitting end for Gothmog, unmade.

I can't wait to see what you have in store for Melkor...

Author's Response: WHY do all my reviews now go into junk? waaa But thank you so much, Narya :) I already do know what is in store for Melkor. :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 15, 2017 20:35 · For: Chapter 5 ~ Fire-eater~
Hands clasped him. He could not see, but he knew it was Elgalad, Vanimórë, Fëanor. Fingon. The latter he had not expected. He wanted to thank them. He had not realised death would be so unutterably lonely. His fingers tightened convulsively

Ohh, Coldagnir :'( he is one of my absolute favourites in your 'verse, and seeing it end this way is heartrending. The idea of such beauty being so utterly ruined is really upsetting.

I have enjoyed the slow reveal of Coldagnir's true nature - I love this about your mythology, so many layers to peel back and examine :)

Even then he had been notorious, not quite one of the gods, something other something perilous, whom had already disrupted the purity of creation.

Like this, for example!

“Thou art Arda,” he said. “That world he loves so, that forms even now, out in the deeps of time and space.” His fine mouth quirked bitterly.

“I was born of its heart, yes,” Mairon replied equably

And this...

You have a wonderful gift in that with every new revelation or development in your story, you make me completely rethink canon. If I ever wrote anything long set in the First Age, it would owe a huge debt to your work.

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 15, 2017 9:58 · For: Chapter 4 ~ Storm Front ~
My favourite thing here was the insight into Sauron/Mairon. His conversation with Eru was fascinating - one of those wonderful moments that sometimes happen when you're reading fic where you go "ah! Of course! That makes so much sense!" You always wrote him as being much more than a servant of Melkor, so seeing what lies behind that is really rewarding as a reader.

Author's Response: Oh,, thank you so much, Narya - I too, thought there was more to him than was apparent from the text. :)

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 11, 2017 22:14 · For: Chapter 3 _ In Unexpected Places, In Unexpected Faces ~
Brilliant again, Spiced :) I found myself liking Marita, so I'm glad they took her with them, and I'm so relieved that those who went in managed to come out again! I was convinced someone was "in for it" and I was really nervous.

“Beleg.” The water had splashed traces of the soot from him. Túrin looked harrowed to the bone, filthy, beautiful, and all the complications of his old life were in his lovely eyes. “I could not believe...I could not...” And the words were there, unsaid, like thunder. I almost killed thee again!

“I know,” Beleg said simply.

Ohh, my heart. These two! :'( :'(

I gather from reading your chapter notes that you haven't been well. I really hope you're feeling better now *hugs*

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Narya :) I am getting there, I hope. I have to go to counselling and physio. I'm also sorry, as my reviews have been apparently going into spam for months, so I am sorry I missed them.

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 10, 2017 22:34 · For: Chapter 2 ~ A Time To Take Risks ~
This is just brilliant. You capture Túrin's humiliation and Beleg's fury perfectly, leading us deep into their feelings and viewpoint, while never losing sight of the others. I especially think it's brilliant how you never let us forget the impact being in here is having on Edenel and Bainalph in particular - all these details make for such an immersive reading experience.

Name: Narya (Signed) · Date: September 10, 2017 15:39 · For: Chapter 1 ~ Into The Shadows ~
I couldn't resist reading the first chapter of this :) it's fantastic, Turin seeing the savagery beneath the beauty of the Elves for the first time - and now he knows who he is, but has been taken by the enemy. I am so nervous, because I don't expect everyone to make it out of there alive :-(

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