What a scene!
The transformations are shocking--but you write with conviction and the emotion comes through powerfully.
Thank you for the review and the compliments! I hope you will like the next chapters!
Oh, oh, this scene with the Silmaril is so heartbreaking! Is that Feanor inside? Has he taken refuge there from all the horror and pain that Morgoth inflicted on him through Ancalagon? OMG my heart! But at least Feanor is still preserved in some way, despite everything that happened, he is still there.
Your take on Eariendil’s ship was fascinating btw! I’ve never seen anything like it! Very cool.
You have me hanging onto a cliff here with that ending! Oh what oh what is going to happen next?????
I guess that "what is left of Fëanor" would be a better answer, since he has lost much of his memories and sense of self at his point and is more Ancalagon that Fëanor, but yep, that was him! The first version of the scene was just Glorfindel showing the Silmaril and Ancalagon being like "ok bye", but that was kind of disappointing. Since the Silmarils are part of his soul and are closely linked to him, they could be used almost like Palantir to reach him (though honestly I'd call that mind rape, there's a reason the Silmarils have been burning people since Finwë died).
Also diving into Fëanor's soul with Fingolfin's cursed sword isn't very nice, but Glorfindel didn't know what he was doing, so I guess he didn't me to disturb poor Ancalagon.
Vingilot the spaceship XD I don't know, I just though the idea of Eärendil sailing in a normal longship with oars kinda ridiculous. So spaceship of light powerered by a Silmaril. Damn, there's so many things one can do with a piece of Fëanor's soul, no wonder no one ever gives him a break.
Oh gosh, oh gosh! They are off to kill Morgoth, and Ancalagon seems to be doing OK, I am keeping my fingers crossed, but I have a terrible feeling that things are going ‘too well’ you know? After everything that’s happened, all they have suffered, can they really get away? And I have a dread of what will happen when Ancalagon and Eärendil encounter one another because Eärendil kills Ancalagon in cannon! Oh no! But, really, maybe that’s the only way for Feanor’s soul to be released again so that he can be re-born as an Elf?
I really love how Maeglin is regaining his strength and facing his fears in these last couple chapter. He’s even off to go face down his tormentor. Go Maeglin!!!
Great chapter :D
Maeglin is definitly on the road toward epicness!
And poor Ancalagon, what can I say? I tagged this fic as "canon compliant" on AO3, so we will see what happens to him!
Good lord! I cannot wait to see how this concludes
With TONS OF FRECKLES and cute baby dragons I'm sure!
I love the sheer size of everything and the darkness and madness of Angband and the confusion, how Ancalgon is timid and about to be released, could burn everyhting- or not.
And where is Caranthir??? Has he the silmarils? Is Finarfin trustworthy?
Great idea. Great story.
I really liked that you noted the size, because I am trying to get to the feeling of "hugeness" of the First Age. Ancalagon is supposed to be the size of a damn mountain! Also Dark Souls is full of huge scary stuffs (have I said already that I love Dark Souls? I did!).
I should rename this fic "it's all about Ancalagon" lol, he is such a precious baby.
Where is Caranthir? You will see in the next chapter, that is already partly written so it will arrive fast!
I breathed a huge sigh of relief when it turned out it was Morgoth behind Curufin’s moment of even deeper insanity. I really thought he was lost there, utterly lost. Like, right now I still have hope he can come back, but I feared he was gone for good if was just wanted to see the world’s burn. I really really love the way he’s split between the Silmarils, himself, and Ancalagon. I just love those little glimpses of how he’s both with the Silmaril in the sky and here with them. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if he’d somehow been able to steer himself more towards the Silmaril free of Morgoth in a last ditch self-defense…..I really wonder if Eärendil knows he’s got company up there?
Maeglin standing up for himself and Curufin!!!! Yes!!!! Everything I’ve ever wanted :) And Glorfindel defeating the Balrog who doomed him to his mess to begin with, yes!!!! This chapter ended on such a note of exhilaration, I loved it!! But at the same time you wrote how they were like broken children so very very well. And that is so right too. They have been living in Angband as thralls for years! And yet they have enough strength still, even desperation and love in them still to stand up for each other.
I wonder what’s happening with Caranthir?
Can’t wait for more :D
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah I am so happy for this review! Thank you!
There are some ideas I am proud of in this fic and Curufin is definitly one of them. He has his own role, and he is torn between this desire to be one with "himself" (or itself, or whatever Ancalagon/Fëanor + Silmarils + Curufin actually are) and being his own self. I loved writing this scene and I wonder: which line is the one that is going to make it clear that Morgoth is speaking here? I am really curious to know which sentence will give enough clues to the readers, if everyone understands that before or after Maeglin gets it (and he does, because he knows Morgoth all too well).
At this point, however, Curufin did very little to get Morgoth out of his head. He doesn't really have a will anymore, it's mostly him being dragged around by those who care for him and he has a lot of troubles getting what is real, where he is and what is truly happening. Like when he killed Eöl, he was thinking he was still in Himlad, but at the same time he was later and he knew Eöl was going to kill Aredhel, so he decided to kill him first, because even his timeline his fucked up.
What saved Curufin is entirely Morgoth's pact with Maeglin. The idea of oaths and prophecies and doom is very strong in Tolkien work, and I wanted this sudden, weird fairtale stuff where the bad guy end up betrayed by own words. (Big inspirations for Souls of Cinder are Elric of Melnibonée for the esthetics of Chaos, HUGE Dark Souls inspiration, a bt of Conan as well). Morgoth tried to destroy Maeglin by making him believe that he had willingly betrayed Gondolin for Idril, then agreed to replace Idril by Curufin in the deal. Morgoth NEVER admitted that Maeglin had been coerced into this (and in Morgoth's twisted mind, Maeglin agreed to this). Of course Maeglin didn't get Gondolin because ha ha it got destroyed and Idril got away... but he can still have Curufin. Maeglin won the battle of wills. He won Curufin, but as he said: he doesn't want to own him, just care for him and love him. He has come a long way since Idril; on the contrary, Eöl needed to prove time and time again that he owned his lover.
Glorfindel versus Nardis: I felt like while Morgoth is the "end boss", he didn't make much sense for Glorfindel, even with Ringil The Cursed Icy Sword running around (because then, that would be Fingolfin's foe, not truly Glorfindel's). Glorfindel is famous in the Silmarillion for being one of the very few to have killed a Balrog, so in this case, this Balrog matters a lot more than Morgoth. That wasn't planned from the start, though, but thinking about Glorfindel who had like zero characterization at the beginning, I needed to give him personnal motivations and goals outside Caranthir (who already does loads of stuffs) and Maeglin (who already has a nice growth as a character): his mother is good for this (he has *someone* to care about if Ancalagon decides to burn Finarfin's army), Ecthelion, and that fucking Balrog who needed to be turned into a character. Glorfindel definitly deserved that rematch. I was thinking hard about a Dark Souls boss for this one, and Morgoth is going to be... well you will soon see!
I have been talking a lot about Dark Souls here because the mood, the feels works really well with the Silmarillion; a dark, gothic, depressing version, in which every foe is thrice you size with too longs arms, flayed skin or is really creepy in some ways. And in Dark Souls 1, it's all about the Fire Fading, the world dying and yet you not dying, and it really makes me feel this is something the elves in later ages would feel like. I may have the plot of a fic about Maedhros and the Fell Winter emerging, but that will wait until I finish your Xmas fic :) (clue: it will have something to do with Ringil).
I got so excited to see a new chapter already! Yesssss!
Good they are getting out! I am so glad things with the Eowne went relatively well. It gives me hope! And I will keep what you said about Glorfindel’s mom in mind and try not to judge her too-harshly yet. She did know her son was involved with Caranthir and never tried to shame him for it, so that, and coming to Beleriand for him, are defiantly pluses in her favor :)
I am really worried about Ancalagon tho!!!! They can’t just leave him there alone. Noooooo! And Curufin. Oh god. He killed Eol who he cared about in his own way, and he is just such a mess, and I am really afraid that if he tries to escape Morgoth is going to kill him through the Silmarils long distance!
This is for Sultry in September so I'd rather write that fast if I don't want to be blacklisted XD I am currently hoping for at least a chapter per week until the end (and then I move to your gift fic and The Archer and the Kings).
I am unexpectedly fond of Olotië, I find her very relatable. Most characters in the Silmarillion are fairly extreme, they are heroic, sometimes disastrously evil, and then you have Olotië who is all about the fashion war and really no one extraordinary lol.
You are right to be worried about Ancalagon! Poor little Ancalagon isn't feeling great, but I am not sure he will feel better if he kills Finarfin and half his army. Finarfin really doesn't need that, the was is already really hard on him and his people, and it isn't going to get better with the drowning and breaking of Beleriand. And Curufin is definitly a wreck at this point, can we even still can him Curufin? His sense of self must be really damaged, there are just too many people in his head right now. He would never had killed Eöl in a normal setting, but now he did and the only person who somehow still had the authority to bring him back is dead.
On to the next chapter!
Oh Kalendeer- I am finding this so distressing - not because it's Feanor but because its Anclagon - a dragon and its afraid and in pain. The power of your imaginings are very effective- it is such a cruel and dismal place. Your description of Curifn and Alcalagon was truly wonderful - so very powerful and emotional, and then the cruelty of Morgoth- and Maeglin's intervention. So much going on, so much energy and emotion. It's quite a punch you're packing here!
This scene was one of the one I just WANTED to write but it was just so hard to get it going! I just love Ancalagon. He is both Fëanor and not Fëanor, "his own person" I am going to say, because he doesn't have the memories, but at the same times the things happening to him are definitly linked to Fëanor.
Morgoth just loves to play with all of them. He loves to use Curufin's connection with Fëanor. He loves to make fun of Maeglin. And he loves to see Caranthir see what is happening to his brother and not being able to stop it. I think messing up with the Fëanorian is 100% Morgoth's version of fun.
Oooooh I just want to punch Finarfin in the face! What a…a…a judgmental prick! He knows nothing. NOTHING!!!!! Oh I hate him! And I really don’t like Glorfindel’s mother. But I think Glorfindel was freaking awesome in this chapter. And Caranthir trying to tease him back into his bed was hilarious. But Ancalagon….you break my heart. And the sunbeam. Oh gods, the sunbeam. And Ancalagon’s songs, and the way he knew, he KNEW when the twins died. And I am latterly crying right now thinking about it. This story is amazing and I love it, I just love it to pieces!
YOU LIKED THE SUNBEAM OMG (this is easily one of my favorite scenes in the fic).
Yep Finarfin turned out not so nice and with a lot of very bad feelings about the Fëanorians, he blames them for everything that happened to his people and children. He is very bitter.
I am a bit more positive about Olotië because I think that Fëanor was a genuine asshole to her. I don't like the idea that Fëanor vs Indis was just one of them being mean to the other. They both had friends and interests and those clashed often, and they were mutually horrible. Olotië's dislike of Fëanor is not gratuitous, even if some of her reactions are petty, I guess anyone would be after centuries of bitching against each others. I wouldn't compare Olotië to, let's say, Irimë: Olotië was never abusing to her son, she loves Glorfindel dearly, and she actually came all the way to Beleriand to find him. And she may not have approved of Caranthir, but she will never let anyone give shit to her son for his choice.
Naked!Caranthir is actually the main focus of this fic, I mean, this is Sultry in September and I was just out of a Conan phase, so I told my room mate "hey what if I wrote a fanfic like that" and she said "if you do remember that the sexy guy must be naked all the time and for no reasons at all", so be ready for Caranthir loosing his shirt everytime he has to grab an axe, because that's definitly going to happen!
Wow. Still in love with this.
First. I am so glad that Glorfindel took the news about Maeglin without rage. I hope that Curufin’s words will stick in his mind and he won’t blame Maeglin.
Feanor as Ancalagon is absolutely brilliant!
Curufin I have all kinds of feels for. He has such deep issues. I wonder if any part of him wants what Eol did to him, or is it all just the price of pay to get his father back? And that part about him seeing his son in Maeglin is absolutely heart breaking.
Gods this is soooo good!
Curufin is 100% the punching bag of this fic lol. The amount of shit coming is way is just fantastic, but he is STILL trying to help Maeglin. First because he blames himself for Aredhel's death ("what if I had sent him the wrong way? What if I had detained him?"). Second because I think Curufin really liked Aredhel, they used to be best friends and he wants to help her son for her sake. And of course there is the whole thing with Celebrimbor and unconsciously, Curufin wants to see his own son in Maeglin since they share loads of traits.
I think that at the beginning Curufin wanted to manipulate Eöl and that was it, but it ends with a lot more than this. Both of them are deeply disturbed, but at some point they start caring for each others and Eöl really loves him, but they are just too messed up to make this work. Eöl is definitly abusive with everyone; he has been there for 100 years already when Curufin arrived and he has just... lost hope.
Fëanor as Ancalagon gives me so many feeeeeeeeeeeeels! Poor little enormous dragon that can burn half of Beleriand. He's the most dangerous baby ever.
If you want more feels, consider that fëanor as been in Angband for 420 years when he becomes Ancalagon, so of course Ancalagon isn't his first incarnation :)
This story is riveting! I’ve never seen anything like it! I’ve only finished chapter 2 so far but it is jam-backed with genius!
First, I’ve never read a Glorfindel/Caranthir story, but I am enjoying this pairing so far :)
I am really worried about Maeglin. I am worried the most about him. Eol seems abusive, and Maeglin is no doubt because crushed under the weight of guilt, and who knows what else (do you believe he was tortured to give up the info on Gondolin?), and I am really really worried about Glorfindel’s reaction when he finds out the truth because he does not seem a very forgiving type, and I am afraid he’s just going to push Maeglin deeper into despair. You have me seriously worried here!
The minute I read that Caranthir’s spirit had ignored the call of Mandos I got all giddy inside! I have written (tho not posted yet as it’s not time in the story) that he ignores Mandos’ call too (tho of course it’s different since I never could have thought up something as brilliant as this adventure in Angband :)), but anyway, I wanted you to know I squealed over that part :D
OK. Feanor. Feanor and Silmairls. The whole thing = brilliance. I loved the way Varda’s hollowing of them affected him, the way he couldn’t bare to be touched, and felt naked and how that’s why he stopped wearing them in public, just…wow. That was so good! I loved it!
But Glorfindel. Seriously. How could he not be moved to at the very least some scrap of compassion for Feanor after what Caranthir told him? I am seriously angry with him and don’t want him anywhere near my precious Maeglin who must be protected from judgmental Elves!!!!
Fingolfin and Fingon….orcs. Gods, what did you do to me? You hear that ripping sound? It’s my heart! Gods, the horror. And what if….what if they are killed as Orcs but it’s far enough from Morgoth that they get called back to Mandos and reborn and they remember. What if…what if they remember killing people they’d loved? OMG.
Thank you so much for the reviews <3
Unfortunatly, all former thralls are bound to go back to Morgoth, so Fingolfin and Fingon are stuck until the end of the war. In this fic though most Valar aren't malicious (the story is meant to be a lot more black and white than my usual), and even what they did to Fëanor was mostly Varda not knowing what she was doing rather than Varda wanting to hurt him. And I couldn't bear the idea of sending all those people back to Valinor after what happened to them, only to have the Valar's crualty hanging over their head (yes this story will have a happy ending).
Glorfindel is the kind of guy who is really nice, usually, but his initial views or Fëanor are heavily influenced by his youth and by the anti-fëanorian views in Gondolin. As explained in later chapters Fëanor really wasn't nice to his family when he was younger so Glorfindel has legitimate reasons not to like him. Of course, it seems rather petty in this situation, but it won't last :)
Your stories are brilliant! I actually got the idea for this one from Lintamandë's post about necromancy, so this story is actually canon compliant.... as unlikely as it seems!
Morgoth is a bastard- I hate him for beating Ancalagon when he is weak and a baby- even the dragon (espcially dragons) is vulnerable as a baby and the contrast with Ecthelion is marked.
Great chapter- it feels very perverted in its real sense, distorted and wrong. Great writing- a really dark underbelly of Tolkien's clean and black and whte world.
Poor Ancalagon needs a break and loads of hugs...
Thank you for the review!
the old, big, lizard-like dragons are going to be outdated soon compared to the winged monsters the Dark God is working on
I really like the way you have Morgoth 'working on' newer models, the business of war. I agree that Tolkien neglected the innovation that comes from war- if the elves were that great, why were they still using swords after thousands of years of fighting??
Oh. My!!!! JUst got to the end!!! Wow.
Well it is canon that Morgoth went from nothing to wingless dragons to winged dragons :) Ancalagon was apparently the biggest one, all other dragons after him were small and cute!
I think the elves just never got around inventing powder. Not only them but also the dwarves and humans. At some point Tolkien saw Numenor as some kind of technologically advanced place (at least industrial revolution themed, but apparently they had missile so more like 50s I guess), but he finally decided against it.
I think the elves, after the first millenia, probably stopped innovating. They like their memories and too much change is weird for them, so at sme point innovation just stops I guess?
POsting my review from Ao3 because I am astonished that you have no reviews here!!!
Oh. WOW! Fantastic ideas, Kalendeer. This just has me leaping about, much like Glorfindel, in my thoughts and specualting what this IS and HOW! I can't do it justice right now- far too late and early morning start but I will digest and think and return to review properly. I love this idea that the Balrog (SHE!) caught Glorfindel and brought him back a captive, that the thousands of souls of elves who died and somehow caught in Angband, in teh bodies of orcs...terifying and chill.
Hi, thank you for the review! The story was poster two days ago so I am not surprised that you are the first here :)